Careers & Jobs

When has fear kept you stuck in a rut? At a fork in the road in your career? When your business stagnates in a bad economy? In a dead end situation that others tell you to leave?

As a coach, I hear clients describe their ruts. Fear has them stuck like gum on a shoe. Meanwhile one single step can remove the gum and get them moving.


Don't Let Fear Be the Gum on Your Shoe Image by:Mahalie



When you want success, know you must change yet feel stuck, don’t let fear be the gum on your shoe.

Break free by finding people who have been through something similar — who no longer have gum on their shoes of course — who will share the steps that got the gum off their shoes!

It sounds obvious and here’s the logic.


  1. Fear of taking a step is lessened by learning from those who have survived the step.
  2. Fear of the unknown is countered by those who now know the unknown.
  3. Fear of acting oddly during the change turns to knowing smiles when you hear how they felt and behaved.
  4. Fear of being wrong crumbles under the evidence of their experience.
  5. Fear of being alone on the journey is eliminated when you travel it through their success.



Well established support groups and their members thrive on these principles. Still many people have issues not defined by any established support group.

Fear not. Online chatters, social media friends, bloggers, authors, and professional coaches all have life experiences to share.

My graphics designer, Kimb Tiboni, has chronicled her Illogical Success with personal insight and real life experiences. I have overcome business hurdles and gained inspiration through friends, coaches, and Twitter chats.


Take one step now and leave your story in the comments section below:

    One rut you broke out of and how you did it and/or
    One rut you want to break out of and two answers you seek.



You want success? Don’t let fear be the gum on your shoe! Reach out and step forward in your life, career, and business.


What stops people from reaching out — when it’s so obvious that it is key to success?

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™


©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on customer service, teamwork, and leading change. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

Do you know what the colors of your clothes are saying about you?

Is your website and brand logo appealing and attractive to your potential buyers or users?

Do you have a favorite color?

Color is a form of non-verbal communication and if you do intercultural business, you need to understand the effect it has on the interpretation of the messages you send to people from different cultures.

The Meaning of Color 

There are two ways in which colors acquire meanings:The natural universal association like green for vegetation and psychological and emotional association or color symbolism based on individual experiences, cultural norms and values.  For example black is for funerals in most western countries while Chinese use white as the color of mourning (see table).
Reference: The Psychology and Meaning of Color in Email and Websites, Aug 2011

Red Yellow Green Black White
China    Good luck, celebration,    happiness     Nourishing     Exorcism, Adultery    Youth,the color for young boys    Funerals
United States   Love, passion, danger,     stop, rage     Hope, hazards,        coward-ness   Spring, go,St. Patrick’s Day,    Christmas Funerals, death, antagonists, Halloween    Weddings,        purity

More about color meaning and cultures: Empower Yourself Going Global With Color Psychology.

Color Psychology

Color has a powerful subliminal and subconscious effect on our physical and emotional well-being. For example if you enter in a mall decorated only in black, gray and white, would you be inspired to buy nice clothes, make-up or even drink coffee? Maybe not.

Color stimulates all our senses and as a result it has an effect on all our purchasing decisions. People make decisions based on their emotions and then justify them with logic. So it is essential that you are aware of both the positive and negative impact and response of each color on the emotions. There is no such thing as a bad color, just colors that are more suitable for your particular business purpose in order to get the response you want.

What does your personality color say about you? (reference: personality colors )

This again depends greatly on culture. Here an example that matches most Americans:

  • If your favorite color is red, you are action oriented with a deep need for physical fulfillment and to experience life through the five senses.
  • If orange is your favorite color, you have a great need to be with people, to socialize with them, and be accepted and respected as part of a group. You also have a need for challenges in your life, whether it is physical or social challenges.
  • Lovers of blue have a deep need to find inner peace and truth, to live their life according to their ideals and beliefs without having to change their inflexible viewpoint of life to satisfy others.
  • Lovers of black have a need for power and control in order to protect their own emotional insecurities.

Colors In International Marketing

When you want to do business globally check the meaning of colors for each country. Color symbolism impacts businesses and personal brands through website or blog graphic design, consumer product development, packaging and corporate identity. The significance of some colors is universal. Other colors, however, have meanings that shift in various cultures.

Online advertisers should be very careful about cultural differences in color symbolism since color is the first thing that is noticed on a web site or banner, even before the person understands the language or what the message says. A miss-match between colors and meanings in a  web site content can potentially ruin the marketer’s objectives.

The customization of color pattern for each country is becoming more and more critical as the population profile of Internet users is shifting rapidly. Latest statistics for 2011 regarding internet users show that Asia has the most internet users accounting for 44% of all users world wide, Europe 22.7 % and North America 13.0%  (Click for Reference).  The top 3 languages spoken on the internet is English with 26.8 % of users Then Chinese with 24.2% and Spanish 7.8% Reference: (Click for Reference )

In an increasingly competitive, global, interconnected and saturated market,
communication needs to be carefully targeted. Few companies have a brand that is powerful enough to generate same response world-wide. For most companies it is important to understand what the impact of communication and color use will be on the targeted group. Therefore it is not only important to understand its meanings but also to find easily applicable rules for translating them.

A very good example of color customization is McDonald’s. The company has different website designs and colors for each country. For example the site for Japan is yellow and for Egypt is red.

How to dress for a job  interview 

The first impression you make during a job interview is the most important one. The first judgment an interviewer makes is going to be based on how you look and what you are wearing and color has probably the greatest impact. Recruiter must remember you for who you are and not for your outfit.

Men’s Interview Attire: In the united states, men should wear a suit  with solid color – navy or dark grey. Tie color and pattern should be conservative and non-distracting, for  example, dark blue and dark red with subtle patterns — stripes and dots are preferred. Shirt should be white or pale blue.

Women’s Interview Attire: Suit navy, black or dark grey. Coordinated blouse: white or ivory any light tone that matches your suit is appropriate. Light make-up and perfume.

More about dress for success in the corporate world: Dress for Success.

Whether you are going global or local, use the magic power of color for your success.


Guest Blogger Bio
Anne Egros http://zestnzen.woprdpress.comAbout Anne Egros, Global Executive Coach, at Zest and Zen International LLC
Anne  Provides Global Business, Career, and Expat Life Coaching Services For International Executives and Managers. Pharmaceutical Doctor (PharmD) with 20 years of international experience as business manager in Fortune 500 Companies. Anne worked as an expat for 20 years: US, Japan, Europe, APAC region. Fluent English, native French speaker. Please contact if you have questions Email: aegros@zestnzen.com.

View all posts by Anne Egros, Global Executive Coach »



Today everyone is asking business leaders to engage employees. Fuel the passion! Business innovation requires it and long term success hinges on it. I agree that this is half the formula.

It takes two traits to be successful — passion and discipline.

Why has discipline fallen out of favor? Perhaps we are mistaking it for rigidity, dogmatism, and resistance to change. It is none of these things. It does not limit or constrain. It develops and guides.

It’s time for all leaders to fuel the passion discipline duo.


Leaders: Fuel Passion Discipline Duo Image by:dbking




The Passion Discipline Duo

  1. Passion starts the journey and discipline guides around the curves.
  2. Passion generates new ideas and discipline vets the possibility against tangible reality.
  3. Passion creates bonds with teammates and customers and discipline delivers the strength to bond even in tough times.
  4. Passion breaks through resistance and overcomes obstacles. Discipline sustains when passion wanes.


The Passion Discipline Duo is in Jeopardy When Leaders


    Are strong in passion or in discipline and don’t honor the other — in others.
    Use stressful times or times of decline as a reason to harp only on discipline.
    Demand evidence too early in a new venture or ignore evidence to avoid admitting mistakes.
    Allow any team member without the passion discipline duo to bully or sway the team to one trait.
    Give in to the fear of either trait.



High achievers of all types — from athletes to entrepreneurs and corporate leaders — fuel the passion discipline duo in themselves and their teams.

What actions do they take?
- Define passion and discipline with their teams

- Brainstorm and use a system to follow-through

- Give passion and discipline equal weight; celebrate both

- Keep the vision/goal always in sight of both

- Honor diverse team members and mentor their duo development


What would you add to this discussion about passion and discipline? What gets in the way of the duo? What fuels it?


From my experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach

©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.

Related Post: The Weakness of Extreme Strength


With inspiration to action, Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, turns obstacles to change into your professional success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote features, footage to view, and customer testimonials.

With ONE Simple Question!

Leaders, managers, investors, parents, and coaches, are often realizing and mentoring someone’s big dream.

The bigger and more outlandish the dream, the greater the disbelief and concern.  This doubt can produce unhelpful reactions like “what are you thinking” or “it sounds too risky”.

Yet there is ONE simple question that powers success with both inspiration and practicality.


Realizing & Mentoring Another's Dream With ONE Simple Powerful Question Image: KLW Photo



The ONE Simple Question

“What do you picture?”

This questions powers positive inquiry, broader and deeper perspective, dialogue, and research. It unearths understanding of:

  1. What does the dreamer think it will take to make the dream a reality?
  2. How complete or accurate is that picture?
  3. What strengths and how much endurance does the dreamer have?
  4. What obstacles does the dreamer foresee – internal and external?
  5. How will the dreamer handle missteps and mistakes – psychologically and practically?
  6. What help, truly, does the dreamer expect?



What do you picture is a far better question that what is your plan? The latter requires great foresight of details at the start yet doesn’t assess the dreamer’s true readiness.


For leaders and managers with a tough career slot to fill, knowing the applicant’s vision of that job is critical to a successful decision.

For parents with wide-eyed teenagers or high achieving college students, asking what do you picture encourages them to consider their dream more deeply without killing their spirit.

For investors in new inventions, knowing how the inventor thinks and pictures the future will affect the win or lose.

For coaches, this one simple question — what do you picture sets up a positive non-directive dialogue with those they coach.


There will be time for plans and details. Yet if you skip the picture and go right to the plan, the plan will be incomplete. It will lack success factors that are found within the dreamer not within the plan.

Have you tried this question — what do you picture? What was the result and response?


From my experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach


©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, guides people from inspiration to action. Her workshops, consultations, keynotes, and DVDs, turn interaction obstacles into interpersonal success and business wins. View footage, keynote topics, workshop outlines, and customer results at this site.

You’ve heard the title before: interim leader or acting manager. I dub this position sudden leader because the need often arises suddenly and is quite often temporary.

Sudden interim leaders often don’t know those they will lead or they know them as peers. They are tapped to fill a gap and thrust with no trust.

They carry the burden of interim status with the challenge of inspiring an unsettled organization or team.

Since so much of what is written is for the full-time leader or manager, I pen this post of 7 do-or-die questions to succeed as the sudden interim leader. I welcome your experience and voice in the comments section below.

Secrets to Succeeding as Sudden Interim Leader or Acting Manager Image by:Paurian



  1. Why Do They Need an Interim Leader? You may only get the formal answer. Yet if they are closed lipped about the reasons, be suspicious. You may even want to pass on the opportunity.

  2. Why you? Ask why you, specifically, are being asked to fill the gap. It not only gives you confidence in the early days it is also the foundation for initial discussions with your organization/team. In the worst case, it gives you a chance to decline the offer if they say we can’t find anyone else (and yes this does happen)!

  3. What is your primary purpose?
    Will your boss want you to:

    Be the temporary focal point for well performing organization? or
    Establish peace in troubled waters? or
    Whip the team into performance shape for the new full-time leader? or
    Rebuild the reputation of the organization? or
    Discover core problems and make recommendations? or
    Stay the course while they decide on new plans for the organization?

  4. What does success look like to your boss? This is not a repeat of question #3. When you ask this question, you will get either additional detail or shocking contradiction. Either way, it is a secret to succeeding as the sudden interim leader or acting manager.

  5. What Are the Hot Risks? What crises are brewing? Will you and the organization have the tools, experience, and authority to handle them? To succeed as the interim leader, find the quicksand before you step in it.

  6. May I Speak With the Team Before Deciding on the Offer? It is a reasonable request and often the answer is yes. If you are not from the organization, you will learn critical information. Hearing the views of those you will temporarily lead allows you to decide if you are the right one for the job and if the job offers enough compensation given the challenges.

  7. What is the Picture for Me? If you are from within the organization, what happens to you and your career when the full-time leader is selected? Your future picture impacts your present success and the present success, your future. Better to know than be surprised later.



What other questions would you ask? What else would you recommend for success as the sudden interim leader or acting manager?


With our shared experience we soar to success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach

©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, delivers coaching, workshops, keynotes, and DVDs that turn interaction obstacles into interpersonal success for customer service, collaboration, teamwork, and leading change. See this site for workshops outlines and customer results. Fill the gaps of diversity with business wins!

I found two people-skills articles online that popped in stark contrast — People-Skills Are the New Black discussing people-skills in healthcare and 10 Stupid User Stories, The Madness Persists  which overlooks the importance of people-skills in technical support.

As one technical professionhealthcare — is embracing the critical importance and value of people-skills, (aka soft or interpersonal skills) others may be holding on to decades old thinking that technical prowess alone is enough.

People Skills in Technical Professions? Impact on End Result?


Nonetheless, many people in technical professions — healthcare, engineering, science, technology, finance, and even law — want to know:

 

What do people-skills contribute to the end result?

 

  • #1 Comprehension. How you interact with people impacts understanding. Attitude, tone of voice, body language, are just a few of the people-skills’ components that affect how people interpret what you say. People-skills create context and context impacts comprehension as much as your words.

  • #2 Influence for cooperation. Going a bit deeper, people-skills are critical if you are going to influence others. Empathy, listening, adapting to personality types, and sharing insight on tough challenges, all empower your words to do more than speak. They can transcend fear, habit, status, and stereotypes. Thus they influence cooperation and buy-in with your patients, business co-workers, customers, and clients.

  • #3 Trust. The big surprise for many technical professionals is that trust is not primarily built on their technical qualifications, capability, and rational data. Recent research with 14,000 takers of the Trust Quotient self-assessment test, indicates that more expertise does not equal more trust: Why Hard Trust is Gained from Soft Skills. People trust based on what seems to agree with their existing inner construct — what makes gut sense long before rational analysis begins. It results, first, from some interaction or reaction between two people not from one person’s (your) individual qualifications.





  • People-skills are the pathway for end results. They are the catalytic force for understanding, influence, trust, decisions, and actions.

    Without them, you are left to reach success without this energy and with the drag that poor people-skills create.

    Combine people-skills with your exceptional expertise and soar in your technical career. The double focus does takes effort, learning, and commitment yet the return is great.

    From my experience to your success,
    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach

    “I teach technical professionals how to interact with non-technical co-workers and customers for collaborative success.”


    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, is a former techie (BS Mathematics) turned people-skills guru with a natural intuition about people. Her consultations, workshops, and coaching transform your occupational focus into business success with service and teamwork. From inspiration to action, Kate will help you fill the gaps of diversity with business wins. See this site for workshop info and customer results.

    When you get busy with success your focus changes and trouble lurks if it blinds you completely. When your career or business finally takes off, do you?


    Do you forget people who have formally or informally mentored you?
    Do you abandon friendships?

    Do you recoil when others who helped you now ask for your help? Do you leave people while telling yourself you are still there?

    You may have busy blindness!

    When Your Career Takes Off - Do You?

    Career or Business Takes Off and Causes Busy Blindness!




    Signs of Busy Blindness

    1. When asked for a time to network, you reply “I am working mega hours per week and the rest of my time is spent with family.”
    2. You wait to reply to emails until you want to connect?
    3. You send out the December holiday letter summarizing your year to people you overlooked all year
    4. or

    5. Post updates about your life online all year at Facebook or Google + and consider that networking.



    Do not despair. Busy blindness is curable.


    People-Skills Tips to Cure Busy Blindness

    • Recognize it. Are there people who made time for you when they were busy? When they try to connect with you now, what is your response?

    • Kick your fear that people may want too much time from you. Staying connected doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice your success. You still have control over your life.

    • Find 5 minutes each day to connect with one person directly via phone, email, or text. Or at least reply to their outreach in a timely manner.

    • Subscribe to their blogs. Leave an occasional comment so they know you are thinking of them.

    • Oddly enough, ask them for more help. If you are extremely busy, you may find that your network that has helped you before will be glad to help you still. Helpers like to stay connected.

    • Turn off the television. You will be amazed at how much time you discover. [Thanks to Jeffrey Gitomer for that one.]

    • If you aren’t even watching television, you can afford to hire a part time personal assistant to keep track of your networking. This assistant will schedule a calendar of connections for you, help you to follow up, and keep your network on your radar screen.



    Perhaps Katie Couric says it best in her new book: The Best Advice I Ever Got: “Today you may be drinking the wine, tomorrow you could be picking the grapes.”

    Either way stay close and connected to the vine!
    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach


    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.

    Related post: Is Anyone There? by Henry Alford. Source: NY Times.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, delivers workshops, keynotes, and consultations that turn interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. Leaders have been booking Kate for 21 years to fill the gaps of diversity with business wins. See this site for customer results and book Kate now.

    Starting a company? Looking for a job? Attempting to sell your house? Trying to change careers? Get noticed by being different but …

    to achieve success — be memorable.



    Memorable is not just what makes you different.  Memorable connects you with others in ways that matter to them.

    Success in Two Words - Be Memorable.




    Memorable affects others.

    Memorable creates a story.

    Memorable builds a trust.

    Memorable sparks an insight.

    Memorable fosters respect.

    Memorable eliminates doubt.

    Memorable comes back to you.

    Memorable keeps you present.

    Memorable changes their reality.

    Memorable reflects value.

    Memorable brings you into their future.






    Be Memorable!

      Do you have noticeably good planning skills? Add and use foresight to be memorable. Prevent a problem on a project or discover and open an opportunity for your customer, your boss or your organization. Outstanding skills get you noticed. Using them to help others makes you memorable.


      Are you a remarkably fast learner? Your boss can hand you anything new and you can do it? That’s good. Learn before the skill is needed and you increase your value. Start today to be memorable tomorrow.


      Do you have a special talent for teamwork? Worthwhile in today’s collaborative workplace. Excel at it during times of stress, low morale, or critical change and you will be memorable to every leader.


      Are you a people person? Sales or customer service is your sweet spot? Certainly a plus. To be memorable, deliver wonderful service recovery with urgency. Offer customers compensation even for the smallest inconvenience. It builds phenomenal trust and reaps gratitude. You will be memorable!

    Kick Start Your Success
    The suggestions above are just a few examples. Try these questions to discover how you can be memorable:

    1. What three things do most people notice about you? Why? The answer will uncover ways for you to be memorable.
    2. What is one strength that people don’t notice in you? Start using it in ways that matter to others.
    3. What are two areas in your work or personal life where you see a need, a void, pain, fear, or doubt in others?. Fill the need/void or remove the pain, fear, or doubt. You will be memorable.



    How have you been memorable in your work or personal life? Please share your story in the comments section below to inspire others.

    To our continued mutual growth,
    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach


    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, delivers workshops, keynotes, and consultations that turn interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. Leaders have been booking Kate for 21 years to fill the gaps of diversity with business wins. See this site for customer results and book Kate now.

    Leaders, did you ever want to tell employees to “grow up”?  What were they doing that brought you to that point?

    Leaders continue to tell me that  employees don’t have sufficient critical thinking skills or commitment to go above and beyond.   Critical thinking, commitment, extra effort — these are all signs of maturity.  A mature employer/employee relationship, a mature team, a mature adult, etc…

    Like many of the business greats of yore, if it doesn’t exist — create it! In this case leaders — cultivate maturity.

    Maturity is about balance, readiness, consideration, and confidence.

    Nine Chances to Cultivate Maturity Image by:J.G. in S.F.

    Take Nine Chances to Cultivate Employee Maturity

    1. When addressing employee concerns and complaints, always speak about the impact on the business. Today it’s popular to focus on changing the workplace to engage employees. If you want maturity in the workplace, balance catering to them with expectation of them.

    2. Illustrate the difference between honesty with diplomacy and candor with rudeness. The former is a sign of maturity for it balances the message and the impact when selecting the words. The latter is a sign of selfish immaturity.

    3. Applaud, highlight, and reinforce excellence. When you set and reward a high standard, you set the bar for that level of mature commitment. If you treat basic behaviors (like meeting objectives or showing up on time) as something special, you cultivate weeds.

    4. Replace the misguided adage “treat each other like customers” with the more mature team mantra “grow and change to reach a shared success and common goal”. Team maturity has a deeper honesty and type of trust that surpasses that of a business and its customers. Cultivate it from the beginning and you cultivate maturity.

    5. Frequently ask, “what are you doing to be ready for tomorrow?” When leaders pose this question, it asks employees to initiate their own growth. This is a call to maturity. Providing training is appropriate yet it develops skills not maturity.

    6. Within a certain sphere, make it OK to make mistakes. Confidence builds faster when mistakes are lessons learned. Sometimes maturity comes from jumping a hurdle and knowing how to prevent a crash next time.

    7. Maturity owns the impact of behavior. Show them how to do it even in difficult moments. Related post: The Perfect Apology and The ONE Word That Destroys It.

    8. Give them access to situations that cultivate a mature open mind. 25 Rules for a Perfect Brainstorm.

    9. Think out loud. Employees learn critical thinking by hearing it and participating in it. If you want to speed this aspect of maturity, tell them how you arrive at a decision not just the decision.


    From my experience to your success,
    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach

    What other chances would you add to this list? Or do you disagree with the premise altogether?

    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, delivers workshops, keynotes, and consultations that turn interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. Leaders have been booking Kate for 21 years to fill the gaps of diversity with teamwork for business wins. See this site for customer results and book Kate now.

    Relationships can sometimes be damaged with ONE word. The word entitled is one such word. For some it conjures up images of pride, excess, privilege, and even laziness. Yet for others it uplifts and gives a sense of security.

    However, if we change that ONE word from entitled to deserving, the negative connotations seem to disappear and the positives remain.

    People-Skills: Be Deserving Not Entitled

    Perhaps because there is a balance to the word deserving.


    It suggests giving and thanks.
    It describes effort and earning.
    It connotes quality and trust.
    It sustains and doesn’t drain.




    Which sits better with you?

  • A leader that is entitled to your trust or deserving of it?
  • A company that is entitled to your customer loyalty or very deserving of it?
  • An employee that is entitled to a promotion or truly deserving of it?
  • A parent that is entitled to your respect or deeply deserving of it?
  • A friend that is entitled to your attention or clearly deserving of it?
  • A spouse that is entitled to your love or certainly deserving of it?
  • As the leader, the company owner, the employee, the parent, friend, or spouse, which would you prefer to be — deserving or entitled?

    Which means more to you? Which means more to those in your work and personal life? When people agree on this, it breeds harmony in organizations, teams, and families. When they differ, it can cause ongoing conflict.

    I vote to be deserving not entitled. What’s your vote?

    From my perspective,
    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach


    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, explores, learns, and teaches professional people-skills for workplace success. Teamwork, customer service, and leading change are her passions. Her natural intuition about people fills the gaps of diversity for business success. See this site for workshop outlines, DVDs, and customer feedback.

    Interacting with others can be carefree or treacherous depending on the situation. Using your best people-skills steers you through the tough moments. But what if you make a mistake?

    It may comfort you to know that your people-skills mistakes won’t define you if

    People Skills Mistakes Won't Define You If ... Image by:Koisney

    You avoid:

    1. Denying in the face of blatant evidence.  “I didn’t make a mistake.  It’s normal for people to get angry or walk away after I speak to them.” – What a fool!
    2. Explaining why you acted that way.  “Here’s why I treated you badly.” - Nincompoop!
    3. Repeating the same mistake.  Moments define you if you don’t learn and change. – Dummy!
    4. Treating people the way you don’t want to be treated. “That’s the way people treat me and misery loves company.” – Sadist!
    5. Giving lame apologies that minimize your mistakes.  Children hide. Adults own the impact of their behavior. -”Childish or Mature”: Which label do you want?
      Related post:The Words That Destroy Apologies

    Great people skills are not magic or voodoo. They are outward examples of consideration for others. You use them in person, on the phone, and online.

    They are the opposite of EGO = Excluding Greatness Of Heart ~Melody Lea Lamb. They build trust, collaboration, and limitless potential.

    Don’t let your people-skills mistakes limit you.

    From my experience to your success,
    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach


    I am planning a free people-skills webinar. Would you like to attend, submit a story, participate or help promote? Email: info@katenasser.com

    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach,, delivers workshops, keynotes, and consultations that turn interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. Leaders have been booking Kate for 21 years to turn people-skills extremes into business success. See this site for customer results and book Kate now.

    Want your career to advance?  Show leadership without the title.  If you live up to your current job description you have shown the leaders that they made the right decision.

    If you step into the leadership gap, you show leaders what decision to make.

    Leadership Without the Title - Success in the Gap |Image via Istock.

    To leaders, your success in the gap is:

    1. A proof of concept that bypasses hell
    2. A purchase with no need for a return policy
    3. An investment that out performs the market
    4. An insurance policy with no deductible

    Not all leaders can envision your potential.  They need to see it right in front of them in order to decide. Why leave your career success up to their inability? Show them.

    How can you do this without alienating teammates?

    1. Spot the teammates with energy – you will fuel each other.
    2. Spot the teammates with inertia – your energy frightens them.  They need safety before they walk into the gap with you.  Give them empathy before energy every time.

    When you fill the gap, you fuel your future.

    Yours in service,
    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach

    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.

    What gaps have you filled that led to success in your career? I would love to hear your story in the comments section below.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, gives inspiration to action in every workshop, keynote, and consultation. Her years of practical experience in corporate work, feed your future success. See this site for what customers say about working with Kate.

    Most everyone, new graduates and experienced workers,  want a  career RISE.  To succeed, connect into the true meaning of these four people-skills traits.

    The deeper you understand, embrace, and develop these 4 people-skills traits, the more valuable you become to the business and the boss — decision makers, executives, and managers.

    Connect People-Skills - Career RISE Image: Eva The Weaver

    RReliability. We think of this mostly as deliver what you promise and/or what you are assigned. That’s expected not exceptional.

      For a career rise, connect into personality styles of the leaders’ you work for and with.
      Understand their hot buttons and stay a step ahead of their needs.
      Know when/how to point out the risk of their view or impending decision.
      Facilitate their actions to make the business successful and help them prevent the failures.

    IIntegrity. Hold professional confidences, behave ethically, be accountable for your actions and energy, correct your mistakes without excuses, give more than is asked or expected. Integrity builds trust and trust delivers long term career success.

    SSelf-confidence. Less neediness and more initiative from you make life easier for your boss.

      What it is: Strength in tough times, comfort adapting to change, insight on how your talent and experience apply to new and different situations, collaboration without fear of losing your own individual success, managing your own ego.

      What it isn’t: False bravado, know-it-all thinking, who’s better than whom attitude, disdain for diversity.

    EExcellence. Pursue excellence through constant learning, innovation, and honest self-evaluation. When you are always learning and accurately assessing needed improvements you give the company (and the boss) more ROI for its decision to hire you.

    What is your ROI for developing these 4 people-skills traits? Career success.

    The executive’s trust in you and reliance on your contributions is the catapult for your career rise and long term success. Imagine a boss saying “I’ve never met anyone I can rely on more” — and then get that designation!


    What other traits and actions have given RISE to your career? Please share your voice in the comments section below. It can help many.

    From my professional experience to your success,
    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™

    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™, delivers people-skills workshops, keynotes, and consultations that take you and your teams from inspiration to action. Combining humor, practicality, and a passion for excellence, Kate re-inspires success in all those she touches. See this site for customers’ comments and book Kate now.

    You see an ad for that job you want. It lists many skill sets. How do you apply for and get that job when you have some but not ALL of the skill sets listed? You must have a mindset beyond the job ad.


    Mindset Beyond the Job Ad


    One of my clients was an accountant. There were no accounting jobs available. She saw a job ad for writing grants at a university. The job ad said grant writing experience needed. She had none. She sketched a clear picture of how her accounting experience made her perfect for the job — beyond the apparent money connection. She got the job.

    Go beyond your list of technical skills and accomplishments. Sketch a true picture of yourself.

    Use this list to honestly assess your strengths. It will help you to apply for that job, interview for that job, get that job, and do that job!

    Get That Job - Mindset Beyond the Ad Image by:http://CourtneyCarmody.com

    1. Are you the inventive creative type when given freedom? Can you also do it when under constraints?

    2. Are you great at seeing the bigger picture beyond individual tasks?
    3. Or are you truly better at digging in to the deep details?

    4. Are you great at initiating change or better at contributing once it starts? Honest assessment of your mindset will guide you to jobs with a natural fit.

    5. If you have great expertise in your technical area, are you also good at explaining/teaching it to others?

    6. Do you have experience in quickly rotating on/off critical project teams?
    7. Or do you have a special knack for building long term relationships within a team?

    8. Do you learn very quickly?
    9. Or is your talent persistence in figuring out confusing details and explaining clearly to others?

    10. What about work excites you? When you dream about happiness at work, what is that picture? This is a critical question. Your mindset comes across in written and verbal communication.

    11. What gives you satisfaction: working with customers, vendors, teammates, or high level executives?
    12. Or do you shine at working behind the scenes to build processes and systems that make keep the organization moving forward?

    13. Do you have experience with different cultures — in your personal life? Note all the specific ways this would be valuable to the organization. With this mindset, you will start looking at job ads that tap this talent!

    14. How well do you give presentations in your area of expertise? Both introverts and extroverts can be great presenters. Businesses get two for the price of one when they hire someone that can do the work and present it to others!

    15. What few words would your closest friends use to describe your strongest traits? This objectivity is priceless to help you get that job.

    Now sketch a picture of yourself with words. Be concise, punchy, and include the benefits to your potential employer using key words from the job ad. If writing is not your strength, get help from someone who writes well. Even accomplished writers have editors.

    Not only will you have a better chance to get that job; you will have a better chance to get a job that fits your natural talents and interests.




    What other questions help sketch a clearer picture of yourself in order to get that job? Do you want my coaching experience to help sketch your picture? Just let me know!


    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. For permission to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, inspires change and action through creativity and practicality. Her workshops, keynotes, dvds, and coaching sessions engage all with inspiration to action. Kate turns your interaction obstacles into professional success. See this site for more information.

    Can you think of someone who would not want to be called the best? Most business leaders and professionals would beam at this honor. Being the best means you have an extreme strength. It emerges from a natural talent or intense study, practice and development.

    Yet there is a weakness to every extreme strength. That weakness is the undeveloped counter-strength you might need today or in the next step of your career.

    Leaders & Teams: The Weakness of Extreme Strength

    For self-development, traditional wisdom says:
    #1 Be aware of your weakness
    #2 Know how to change
    #3 Have the desire to change


    Why does the weakness often persist?

    1. The organization taps you for your strength. More of your time is spent using a strength than developing a counter-strength.
    2. Using the strength feels better than the struggle of developing a weakness. We yield to the positive feelings.
    3. Being called the best can create overconfidence and block growth. Consider, when are you too confident to learn?
    4. Believing that the counter-strength is inconsistent with the extreme strength. Picture a strong analytic who relies heavily on data and looks down on those who don’t. How likely is this analytic to develop and use big picture thinking necessary in a leadership position?
    5. Fearing that it will weaken the extreme strength. For example, strong driver personalities who push for the end results are afraid that learning participative leadership will undermine success.

    The Grip of Extreme Strength




    Overcoming the grip of extreme strength:

    1. If the organization is the block, ask for a short project where you can learn a counter-strength.
    2. If the positive feelings are holding you back, picture the negative feelings of being unprepared for the next skill set needed.
    3. If overconfidence is trapping you, find a trusted friend or mentor to snap you out of it with honest feedback.
    4. If are stuck in one belief, search for examples to test the accuracy of it. Is it a feeling or a fact? If it is a feeling, you can stretch past it and develop a counter-strength.
    5. If fear of failure is stopping you, find people who have your strength and the counter-strength you need. Their balanced success can move you past your fear.



    How have you developed counter-strengths to balance your greatest strengths? What success have you had that will help others? Please share your story below.


    ©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. For permission to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com.


    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, turns change obstacles into your professional success with inspiration to action. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote features, footage to view, and customer testimonials.

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