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Leaders, Don’t Mislabel All Issues as Personality Conflict

Leaders who are averse to conflict, quickly mislabel interaction issues as — just a personality conflict.

It’s one of those feel good denial reactions that creates additional problems. Mislabelling it as a personality conflict ignites hidden resentments. It also fails miserably as it overlooks the true issues to be resolved. That’s not to say that a personality conflict can’t arise. It can.

Yet there are many other causes of interaction difficulty. People may have different definitions of team and teamwork. There may be low trust or little respect. It’s important to determine the true causes instead of writing it all off to just a personality conflict.



Mislabelled Personality Conflict: Image is cracked eggs.

Not all trouble is a personality conflict. Image by Quinn Dumbrowski

Image by: Quinn Dombrowski via Flickr Creative Commons License.



An Illustration

A new leader (Bill) joined the leadership team. He has 5 peers and each oversees a different department. They and their teams must interact to deliver a wow customer experience. During the first week, Bill makes many demands on the peer he interacts with the most (Pat). He ultimately says to Pat, “I always get my way.”

When Pat requests a more team based approach, Bill takes offense. The high level leader (Lee) meets with Bill and Pat and says, “you two are having a personality conflict.”


Lee made a big mistake. He lost Pat’s trust that day. Assuming that two people who are having a conflict are having a personality conflict solves nothing. It also makes the leader (Lee) look weak and illogical.



What to Do Instead?

  • Establish and Honor a Baseline. Leaders who engage everyone in developing effective baseline behaviors pave the road to success. In today’s culturally diverse workplace, discussions expand understanding and prevent lots of conflicts. Once people establish baseline behaviors, it’s much easier to see errant behavior from a personality conflict.

    Important baseline behaviors to discuss:

    1. Behaviors for shared spaces
    2. Rules on texting during important meetings
    3. Acceptable ways to disagree and discuss strong views
    4. Handling aggressive and passive aggressive behavior


  • Dig to Discover. If the interaction issues in question are not errant behaviors, then find out what’s happening. To do this well, leaders must promise those who speak up that they will not be punished or minimized for the information they offer.

    It works well to have everyone involved to say what they are experiencing and what they would like to experience instead. This prevents gripe fests and discovers workable solutions.



  • Follow-through. Even if you are using HR or outside consultants to help you through this, leaders must stay involved. It is your expectation of improvement and your follow-through that bolsters employees’ commitment. Interaction affects the bottom line.

    Don’t just delegate this to someone and turn away. Assess, inspire, and stay involved.


Risks to Mislabeling Issues as Personality Conflict



  • Divisiveness. When leaders skip over discovering the trouble, the trouble persists. Un-addressed issues fester and feed frustration. Resentment grows as the leaders replace the truth with their assumptions of a personality conflict.


  • Mistrust and disrespect. Employees tap leaders for their insight, objectivity, strength, and honesty. When leaders tap dance around the issue instead of thinking it through, people lose trust and respect for those leaders. The loss of trust lingers and impacts the organization’s results.

  • Self-protection. When someone raises an issue about interaction problems and the leaders quickly pass it off as personality conflict, people think they are being punished for speaking up. After that, those who raised the issues go into self-protection mode. They block the open mindset needed for resolution and organizational success.

  • Weakened Core Values. The modern workplace is sustained with core values of respect, honesty, truth, and accountability. When leaders twist any situation into something it isn’t, it undermines interaction that could otherwise keep the organization moving forward. Whether it’s leader to leader, employee to employee, or leader and employee, discovering the true issues and addressing them appropriately secures the core values of success.





Most everyone can see the value in positive workplace interaction. What some leaders don’t see is that they play a key role in sustaining it through their accurate assessment. This doesn’t mean you are babysitting — a metaphor often misapplied in these moments. You are leading!

There is even evidence to show that employees leave jobs because of mislabelled un-addressed interpersonal issues that have made work intolerable. In the end, leaders who invest in sustaining the core values of interaction inspire collaboration and fuel success.


What other workplace behaviors is it valuable to discuss?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
18 Things Respected Well-Liked Leaders Consistently Do
Leadership to Reverse a Hostile Workplace
Tapping the Profitable Secrets of Personality Types

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.




QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Diverse Workplace Collaboration: JOIN us in #Peopleskills chat and share your views.

WHEN: Sunday March 29, 2015 at 10AM EDT. Hashtag: #peopleskills


Background on This Chat Topic: Diverse Workplace Collaboration

Just how tough is collaboration? Do we grow up knowing how or learning how to do it? Or perhaps it’s something that some people love to do and others don’t. Yet when they get into the workforce, collaboration seems to be required. Very few people do all their tasks alone! JOIN our #Peopleskills Twitter chat this Sunday to explore diverse workplace collaboration!

My special co-host on this topic is Jon Mertz. leadership consultant and author of Activate Leadership: Aspen Truths to Empower Millennial Leaders. Jon’s contribution to cross-generational productivity is extensive and his social media presence shares that expertise across many platforms. You can read his blog posts and tap his expertise at ThinDifference.com.



Diverse Workplace Collaboration: Image is People skills logo

Diverse Workplace Collaboration: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.


Diverse Workplace Collaboration: How to Make It Stronger!

Many people connect. Do they truly collaborate especially when they have different perspectives? JOIN us in #Peopleskills global Twitter chat to explore diverse workplace collaboration.

Some questions to get us thinking in advance. Actual questions will post live during the chat.

  • Many connect; not everyone collaborates. What’s the difference?
  • What makes a person suited for collaboration?
  • What sparks and sustains diverse workplace collaboration?
  • How do you prevent or manage conflict in collaboration?
  • How does collaboration make a difference in the workplace?
  • What people skills breed more than connection — in other words collaboration?
  • OPINION: Is it tough to collaborate with people who are different from you? Why/why not?
  • What skills do you need to collaborate when you can’t be together in the same place?
  • What group dynamics change when collaborators have different perspectives?
  • If diverse generations openly collaborate in trust, what will the next 10 years look like at work?
  • How can leaders create a collaborative culture with so much diversity in the workplace?
  • Why do some leaders not promote collaboration?


So bring your personal perspective, your favorite beverage, and join me and the people skills global chat community this Sunday March 29, 2015 on Twitter (hashtag: #peopleskills) to diverse workplace collaboration.


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining the Google+ People Skills Community and the LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to be a part of all the people skills discussions everyday 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Out of Gratitude

Special thanks to my co-host this week Jon Mertz. My gratitude to all who participate and grow the people skills global chat community on Twitter (#peopleskills), Google+, and LinkedIn. We welcome your suggestions for topics, offers to co-host, and most especially your individual insights.

Continued thanks to generous chat moderators Chantal Bechervaise, Dave Moore, Hoda Maalouf, Tracy Shroyer, Jandis Price and Tom Rhodes for their time and insightful contributions.






Hope you will all join People Skills Global Chat on Twitter #peopleskills this Sunday March 29, 2015 10am EDT/7am PDT to diverse workplace collaboration.

Everyone is welcome! We have only one rule in People Skills Global Chat: Respect for all even when we disagree.







TIP: If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Twubs.com or Tweetchat.com, enter hashtag #peopleskills, and sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Tchat.io, Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Chat with you this Sun. March 29, 2015 10am EDT in People Skills Global Chat on Twitter (#peopleskills) TOPIC: Diverse Workplace Collaboration.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!


From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

Teamwork Productivity: Why Can’t Everyone Automatically Get Along?


Leaders call me when they want teamwork productivity to improve. Their frustration pours out in the question:


Why can’t people just get along and stop the petty squabbles?”



Teamwork Productivity: image is 2 chess pieces in face to face standoff.

Teamwork Productivity: Reasons Why People Can’t Automatically Get Along Image by Juan Ignacio Sánchez Lara via Flickr.


Image by Juan Ignacio Sánchez Lara via Flickr Creative Commons License.


Teamwork Productivity: 21 Reasons Why Employees Can’t Just Get Along

There are many reasons why employees can’t automatically get along.

  1. They have different personality types and don’t know how to adapt or don’t want to.
  2. They feel overrun by mavericks on the team who don’t collaborate.
  3. Their low emotional intelligence keeps squabbles alive.
  4. Respect is low
  5. Trust is low.
  6. They have different personal career goals.
  7. They come from different cultures and with different mores.
  8. They are competing for a limited number of promotional opportunities.
  9. They have different habits which drive each other crazy.
  10. They have different definitions of team and teamwork.
  11. Teams goals and acceptable team behaviors aren’t clear.
  12. They have old baggage that affects today’s behavior.
  13. They slow or stop interacting to avoid conflict.
  14. There is bullying going on that you haven’t addressed or don’t even know about.
  15. They don’t know how to disagree in a productive way. Instead, they express thoughts and emotions in an aggressive way.
  16. Some who seem to work harder resent those who seem to work less.
  17. There are some team members who give orders to others instead of asking. “Get me those numbers right away!” This lowers teamwork productivity.
  18. You have a blame culture and people are pulling back to avoid failure.
  19. Change agents who are innovating are disrespecting past and current efforts. People take offense and interaction suffers. (FYI: You don’t have to demean the past to create the future.)
  20. Leaders aren’t forthright about upcoming changes and the rumor mill reduces teamwork and productivity.
  21. Leaders don’t express appreciation and recognition for employees’ work and talents so they don’t express it to each other. Low inspiration = low engagement and teamwork productivity.


When employees ask you, the leader, to help with these struggles, telling them to work it out themselves or stop complaining makes matters worse. If they could, they would.

Delegating it someone else to handle won’t settle matters either.




What Does Work?

  • Ask, listen, and explore options. Involve the teams in making things better.
  • Redefine teamwork. Most leaders and teams are still defining it as a group of people working toward common goals and results. And you see where that’s gotten you. A team actually is: people growing, changing, and adapting to reach a shared success. If you don’t include growing, changing, adapting in your definition of a team, people work on common goals purely from their own style and view. You then end up on the list of 21 troubles.
  • As a leader, increase your emotional self-awareness and emotional intelligence. Leadership is about inspiring and influencing others. This creates a better work environment and minimizes the 21 troubles.
  • Tap outside help. Independent team builders bring specialized expertise, fresh perspectives, objectivity, and the ability to say things that insiders can’t risk saying.


Most importantly, don’t let these troubles fester. Although you can’t prevent all of them, you can address interaction troubles as they surface. Left alone, these struggles become long held grudges with insurmountable barriers.




In your experience, what else stops people from working well together?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
Teamwork Productivity: 5 Essentials to Build 21st Century Teams
Modern Leadership & Teamwork: Be Selfless Not Faceless
18 Things Respected Well-Liked Leaders Consistently Do
One Giant Communication Blunder & One Easy Fix

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Healthcare People Skills: JOIN us in #Peopleskills chat share your view.

WHEN: Sunday March 22, 2015 at 10AM EDT. Hashtag: #peopleskills


Background on This Chat Topic: Healthcare People Skills

How do doctors, nurses, physician assistants, physical therapists, medical assistants and medical technicians treat you? I don’t mean the medical treatments they give you. I mean how good are their people skills? Do they show empathy? Do they listen? Do they respond well to questions or rush about and cut you off? Our #Peopleskills Twitter chat explores healthcare people skills this Sunday.

My wonderful co-host is Dr. Gia Sison. Dr. Sison is a practicing physician, breast cancer survivor, and first Philippine leader of Livestrong Foundation. She is a powerful voice on social media about healthcare and healing. She faclitates the #HealthXPh Twitter chat and lends her voice to other online healthcare convos.



Healthcare People Skills: Image is People skills logo

Healthcare People Skills: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.


Healthcare People Skills: Do They Matter?

Do healthcare providers still care about bedside manner? Do medical, nursing, and physical therapy schools highlight it? Do they teach the importance of listening and getting the patient’s story? JOIN us in #Peopleskills global Twitter chat to explore healthcare people skills.

Some questions to get us thinking in advance. Actual questions will post live during the chat.

  • When you are the patient, how important are the people skills of those treating you?
  • What people skills are important in providing excellent healthcare?
  • What happens when medical office staff and those providing direct care have poor people skills?
  • How can healthcare providers & staff be more open to patient questions?
  • Think of the doctors you truly like and trust? How do they behave? Why do you like and trust them?
  • How do cultural differences impact people skills and healthcare?
  • How can everyone involved in delivering healthcare develop better people skills?


So bring your personal perspective, your favorite beverage, and join me and the people skills global chat community this Sunday March 22, 2015 on Twitter (hashtag: #peopleskills) to explore healthcare people skills.


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining the Google+ People Skills Community and the LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to be a part of all the people skills discussions everyday 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Out of Gratitude

Special thanks to my co-host this week Dr. Gia Sison. My gratitude to all who participate and grow the people skills global chat community on Twitter (#peopleskills), Google+, and LinkedIn. We welcome your suggestions for topics, offers to co-host, and most especially your individual insights.

Continued thanks to generous chat moderators Chantal Bechervaise, Dave Moore, Hoda Maalouf, Tracy Shroyer, Jandis Price and Tom Rhodes for their time and insightful contributions.






Hope you will all join People Skills Global Chat on Twitter #peopleskills this Sunday March 22, 2015 10am EDT/7am PDT to healthcare people skills.

Everyone is welcome! We have only one rule in People Skills Global Chat: Respect for all even when we disagree.







TIP: If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Twubs.com or Tweetchat.com, enter hashtag #peopleskills, and sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Tchat.io, Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Chat with you this Sun. March 22, 2015 10am EDT in People Skills Global Chat on Twitter (#peopleskills) TOPIC: Healthcare People Skills.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!


From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

Difficult Customer Moments: Free Your Mind!


With more than twenty years of teaching how to handle difficult customer moments, I can attest to one eternal truth:

Both the obstacle and the pathway to handing difficult moments with customers are in the mind — our minds, not theirs.



Difficult Customer Moments: Image is sign that says free your mind now!

Free Your Mind to Deliver Superior Service in Difficult Customer Moments Image by: EnvironmentBlog

Image by: Environmentblog via Creative Commons License


In Difficult Customer Moments: Free Our Minds!

First and most importantly, let’s free our minds of the disdainful phrase — difficult customer — and replace it with the empowering phrase, difficult moment. This changes our outlook from one of resentment and disregard to empowered action. We don’t resent customers and who they are. We work to remedy the difficulty.

Secondly replace our desperate lament “Why Me”, with the mind freeing phrase “What If”.



What If …

  1. The customer has goals we don’t understand yet?
  2. The customer’s personality is different from ours?
  3. There’s an urgency we are not aware of?
  4. The customer has insight beyond ours?
  5. There are cultural differences causing stress?
  6. The customer simply feels confused and worried?
  7. The customer is pressed for time?
  8. Trust is still lacking?



And What If …

  1. We listen carefully to hear what the customer is saying and not saying?
  2. We adapt to the customer’s personality type to build the bond?
  3. We explore to detect the urgent pressure?
  4. We hear the need instead of an attack to learn the bigger picture?
  5. We let the customer set the cultural bent?
  6. We clear confusion to relieve the worry?
  7. We empathize and then get to resolving the issue?
  8. We do everything we can to rebuild trust?



The phrase “What if” lights up the creative parts of our brain freeing us from the emotional trap of defensiveness. When we free our minds of labels and blame, we see and hear invaluable information, alternate views, and previously undetected possibilities.

Open-mindedness transforms the difficult customer moment from heavy burden to superior customer service. Our adaptability and new thinking show the customer our professional care and that echoes throughout the customer’s community.



Action Summary
In difficult customer moments, silently ask yourself these what ifs. This mind freeing approach will:

  • Keep you calm and caring.
  • Stop you from telling the customer “calm down.” (Don’t ever say this!)
  • Tool you with great questions to ask the customer.
  • Improve your listening.
  • Fuel you with ideas on how to resolve the problem.
  • Lift your spirit and sustain your morale.
  • Wow the customer with care and great service recovery.



When have you received great care as a customer when you were upset?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
5 Powerful Beliefs & Actions to Win Over Rude or Angry Customers
24 Customer Service Tips to Make it Easy for Customers

©2012-2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Forgiveness: JOIN us in #Peopleskills chat to explore this.

WHEN: Sunday March 15th, 2015 at 10AM EDT. Hashtag: #peopleskills


Background on This Chat Topic: Forgiveness at Work and In Life

A recent article in Forbes magazine caught my eye. Forgiveness – The Least Understood Leadership Trait. The opening line of the article draws you in.

It hooked me with the claim that online search for leadership and forgiveness produced little if any results. It made me stop and ask myself how often have I heard forgiveness discussed in business? Not often. It made me wonder, why not?



Forgiveness: Image is People skills logo

People Skills Chat Topic is Forgiveness: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.


Forgiveness: Is It Important in Business?

There are so many dimensions to this question. Here are some to get us all thinking before our people skills Twitter chat on Sunday.

  • What does it mean to forgive and what does it do for us?
  • What is the opposite of forgiveness and the impact of it?
  • It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend. ~William Blake Ag/Dis Why?
  • Can you be too forgiving? Are there risks to it?
  • Forgiveness and trust: How do they relate?
  • Does forgiveness turn an enemy into a trusted friend or can you forgive but not forget?
  • Is forgiveness all or nothing or are some things unforgivable?
  • Humility and forgiveness: Are they essential to each other? Pls. explain.
  • Does forgiveness foster and feed selfish behavior in others? Pls. expl.
  • What are the business benefits of forgiveness?
  • How does forgiveness impact accountability? Y/N Pls. explain.
  • Should leaders actively develop their capacity to forgive? Why/why not?
  • What is the difference between being forgiving vs avoiding conflict?
  • In business that believes in forgiveness, should it be an individual choice or a core value all must live?
  • Forgiveness, mistakes, and learning: How do they relate?
  • How can leaders practice forgiveness at work and still focus on profit?
  • How can people skills foster forgiveness in work and life?



These are just some questions to get us thinking before we begin the people skills chat this Sunday. Actual questions will post live during the chat.

So bring your personal perspective, your favorite beverage, and join me and the people skills global chat community this Sunday March 15, 2015 on Twitter (hashtag: #peopleskills) to explore forgiveness at work and in life.


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining the Google+ People Skills Community and the LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to be a part of all the people skills discussions everyday 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Out of Gratitude

My gratitude to all who participate and grow the people skills global chat community on Twitter (#peopleskills), Google+, and LinkedIn. We welcome your suggestions for topics, offers to co-host, and most especially your individual insights.

Continued thanks to generous chat moderators Chantal Bechervaise, Dave Moore, Hoda Maalouf, Tracy Shroyer, Jandis Price and Tom Rhodes for their time and insightful contributions.






Hope you will all join People Skills Global Chat on Twitter #peopleskills this Sunday March 15, 2015 10am EDT/7am PDT to explore if forgiveness at work and in life.

Everyone is welcome! We have only one rule in People Skills Global Chat: Respect for all even when we disagree.







TIP: If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Twubs.com or Tweetchat.com, enter hashtag #peopleskills, and sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Tchat.io, Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Chat with you this Sun. March 15, 2015 10am EDT in People Skills Global Chat on Twitter (#peopleskills) TOPIC: Forgiveness at Work and Life.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

Giant Communication Blunder & One Very Easy Fix

You feel strongly about something. You want others to care about it. As you communicate with them, you hit a brick wall! What’s the problem? You built the wall!

Giant Communication Blunder: Image is brick wall w/ a one way sign on it.

Giant Communication Blunder. Image by Great Beyond via Flickr Creative Commons License.

Grateful for image by Great Beyond via Flickr Creative Commons License.

Ask yourself, have you slipped into stating questions instead of asking questions? When people feel strongly about something they often slip into stating a question that tells instead of asks.


Don’t you think? Wouldn’t it be better?


What answers do you expect? You are in tell and sell mode and pretending it is conversation and listening.

Instead of stating their true opinions, they either say “no”, say nothing, or walk away. You suddenly face the brick wall you built.


Can’t people disagree regardless of how you pose the question? Yes, some can. Will they want to bother? Very likely no.

Questions like “don’t you think” …

  • Treat others as subordinate
  • Suggest others’ views are not important
  • Demand agreement while pretending to be open-minded


This is a giant communication blunder. Who wants to scale a brick wall of pretense and arrogance — especially when they don’t care as much about your cause as you do.


One Easy Fix to This Giant Communication Blunder

State your opinion as opinion and ask open-ended questions to engage others. “What do you think?” vs. “Don’t you think?” Ask and listen.

Influence honors others with generous restraint and gentle honesty. It invites people to express their views and make their own decision.




What else do you think contributes to influential communication?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
Potent Communication: 9 Easy People Skills Tips
Silence: When Is It Golden and When Not?

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

People Skills Impact Change: JOIN us in #Peopleskills chat

WHEN: Sunday March 8, 2015 at 10AM EDT. Hashtag: #peopleskills

NOTE: Daylight Savings Time starts this weekend. In North America, move clocks ahead one hour.


Background on This Chat Topic: People Skills Impact Change

Change is always a hot topic for it presents so many challenges in life. How does change impact human interactions? Can great people skills help people handle change more easily? How do people skills impact change?

For this chat, I have asked Dave Moore, creator of HPT-Transformation and people skills community moderator to join me as co-host. HPT (Human Potential Technology) is concerned with transforming the context in which one views and experiences life. HPT does not change what one knows; it transforms the way in which one knows.”


People Skills Impact Change: Image is People skills logo

People Skills Impact Change: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.


How Do People Skills Impact Change?

In times of change, do people skills make a difference? As people change, do their human interactions change? We will weigh into this weighty topic in Sunday’s people skills global Twitter chat on how do people skills impact change.

Some questions that come to mind …

  • How does change affect people?
  • Is change more inspiring than stressful or more stressful than inspiring?
  • What happens when change resistors meet change lovers?
  • How can a leader inspire people to grow and change while still honoring who they are?
  • What role does humility play in change, if at all?
  • Does emotional intelligence make it easier to adapt to change? Pls. explain.
  • How do #peopleskills help navigate change?
  • How have changes in your life impacted your human interaction?
  • Is it possible to change while keeping elements of the old? Even in relationships?
  • If you could change one thing in your life or business relationships, what would it be?
  • What would you do to help someone struggling with change?



These are just some questions to get us thinking before we begin the people skills chat this Sunday. Actual questions will post live during the chat.

So bring your personal perspective, your favorite beverage, and join me, Dave Moore, and the people skills global chat community this Sunday March 8, 2015 on Twitter (hashtag: #peopleskills) to explore how do people skills impact change?


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining the Google+ People Skills Community and the LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to be a part of all the people skills discussions everyday 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Out of Gratitude

Thank you Dave Moore @mooreconsortium for co-hosting this change topic.

My gratitude to all who participate and grow the people skills global chat community on Twitter (#peopleskills), Google+, and LinkedIn. We welcome your suggestions for topics, offers to co-host, and most especially your individual insights.






Hope you will all join People Skills Global Chat on Twitter #peopleskills this Sunday March 8, 2015 10am EDT/7am PDT to explore how do people skills impact change?

Everyone is welcome! We have only one rule in People Skills Global Chat: Respect for all even when we disagree.







TIP: If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Twubs.com or Tweetchat.com, enter hashtag #peopleskills, and sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Tchat.io, Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Chat with you this Sun. March 8, 2015 10am EDT in People Skills Global Chat on Twitter (#peopleskills) TOPIC: People Skills Handle Change.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

Reverse Hostile Workplace: Purge Toxic Hidden Beliefs


Reverse Hostile Workplace: Image is one fish of different color from the rest & hand stopping it.

Leadership to Reverse Hostile Workplace Image by Tracy Poon via Flickr.

Image by Tracy Poon via Flickr Creative Commons License.

The LA Times recently featured how women are leaving the tech industry in droves because of male leader bias and hostile workplace. As leaders are challenged to address this, they ask: What beliefs and behaviors are behind it? In addition to the obvious signs, what creates this hostile workplace and how can leaders reverse it?


Leadership to Reverse Hostile Workplace: Beliefs & Behaviors

Unearth the strongly held beliefs that create a hostile workplace.

    Image is office cabinet - left side says "harmful" right says "irritant".

    Image by Adele Turner via Flickr Creative Commons License.

  1. “Differences are either right or wrong.”

    Differences are neither. Yet because differences can be irritating, people label them as harmful.

    In your organization, do leaders and managers label differences as harmful? Do they belief differences slow down work and reduce productivity? It’s not far from that belief to behaviors like giving plum assignments and promotions to people who are in the majority or similar to the leaders and managers. In the LA Times article, the manager claimed he had a feeling that the person he selected (a man) could work faster than the woman.



  2. “The opposite of logical is emotional.”

    Not true. The opposite of logical is illogical — errant thinking that produces false results. Yet leaders and managers who are uncomfortable with emotion label it as illogical. This belief comes out in statements like “Don’t be emotional.” They sideline or overlook those who show emotion and promote those who are like them.

    As this thinking spreads from these emotionally unintelligent leaders and managers to team members, it creates a workplace hostile to diversity. How ironic! Their focus on logic is the illogic that fosters a hostile workplace. Emotional self-awareness and emotional intelligence are key in reversing these hostile effects.


  3. “Those who are different must prove their worth.”

    This is a dangerous business belief on many levels. It shows the mistaken belief that the business is successful because of the majority — in other words the status quo. Yet businesses who thrive adapt well to change. Status quo and fear of someone different doesn’t lead businesses to huge success. The hostile workplace this errant belief creates, drives the exodus of talent that you need for success. Generational differences, gender differences, personality differences, racial differences, etc… are the rich mix of success.



These mistaken beliefs and fear of differences blind leaders to the hostile workplace they create. As long as there are no obvious signs like abusive language, racial slurs, sexual innuendo, etc…, the leaders don’t see a hostile workplace.


Reverse this blindness by looking at the beliefs not just behaviors or absence of them. To use a technical analogy from my career in information technology — garbage in, garbage out. Bad data going in creates bad results. Errant beliefs in an organization create a hostile workplace and a talent drain.


Hostile Workplace: Leadership Steps to Reverse It

  • Explore current beliefs. Don’t recycle the old ones. They may not be worth saving.
  • Unearth assumptions about people. Discuss the assumptions and replace them with enlightened truth.
  • Spot differences that irritate. Don’t sideline them or label them as harmful. Work through them remembering that irritation produces pearls!
  • Check your comfort zone. The more comfortable you as leaders and managers are in your circle, the greater the chance different team members experience a hostile workplace out there.
  • Develop your emotional intelligence. Insecurity and lack of empathy foster a hostile workplace.
  • Be aware of the culture club you’ve created. Change consultant Alli Polin advises, “Leaders, when you plan a team event for everyone, ask yourselves it appropriate for everyone? Or does it reflect a closed club (e.g. a boy’s club with drinks at a local bar). She makes a great point. When leaders approach me for team building, I always get input from the teams to help leaders avoid this culture club skew.
  • Develop diverse people and their talent. Using the majority and status quo as the standard of excellence is not excellent leadership. It is the garbage in/garbage out effect of false beliefs produce bad results.


Take a lesson from Monique Leroux, CEO of DesJardin Group in Canada who says that you must set a target for building more diversity in leadership. To have the talent at hand, you must plan and develop it.





Your View: Are companies reversing the hostile workplace? Are they more inclusive and open to diversity?

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Grateful for cabinet image by Adele Turner via Flickr Creative Commons License.

Related Posts:
3 Responses to Overcome Bias
Develop Emotional Intelligence w/ These 5 Steps

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Career People Skills: 4 Traits to Develop

Most everyone, new graduates and experienced workers,  want their career to rise.  To do it, plug into the deeper aspects of the following four traits that always breed success.


Career People Skills: Image is an electrical plug.

Career People Skills: 4 Traits to Develop for Success Image by Eva the Weaver via Flickr.

Grateful for image by Eva the Weaver via Flickr Creative Commons License.


Career People Skills: 4 Traits to Plug Into & Develop More Deeply



RReliability. We think of this mostly as deliver what you promise and what you are assigned. That’s expected not exceptional.

For a career rise, spot & adapt to personality styles of the leaders’ you work for and team members you work with. People see you through the lens of their own personality type.

  • Understand their hot buttons and pet peeves. Work without pushing those buttons.
  • Know when and how to point out the risk of their view or impending decision without insulting them.
  • Facilitate leaders’ actions to make the business successful and help them prevent the failures.



IIntegrity. Hold professional confidences, behave ethically, be accountable for your actions and energy, correct your mistakes without excuses, give more than is asked or expected. Integrity builds trust and trust delivers long term career success.


SSelf-Confidence. Less neediness and more initiative from you make life easier for your boss and team members.

Self-confidence is …

  • strength in tough times
  • comfort adapting to change
  • insight on how your talent and experience apply to different situations
  • collaboration without fear of losing your own individual success
  • managing your own ego



Self-confidence isn’t …

  • false bravado
  • know-it-all thinking
  • who’s better than whom attitude
  • disdain for diversity



EExcellence. Pursue excellence through constant learning, innovation, and honest self-evaluation. When you are always learning you give the company, teams, and leaders more ROI on their decision to hire you.



The ROI for developing these 4 people skills traits — career success!



Leaders’ trust and reliance on your contributions is the catapult for your career rise and long term success. Imagine a boss saying “I’ve never met anyone I can rely on more” — and then earn that designation!

What other traits and actions have given RISE to your career?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related posts:
Career People Skills Etiquette: 6 Actions That Leave a Bad Impression & the Alternatives
Accountability Legacy: Career Secrets Revealed
Career People Skills Checklist: Are You Brutally Blunt or Helpfully Honest?

©2011-2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Bragging vs Sharing Success Stories – People Skills global Twitter chat topic.

WHEN/WHERE: Join us Sunday March 1st, 2015 on Twitter at 10AM ET. Hashtag: #peopleskills


Time converter:
Please click the time converter link above to convert 10am ET to your local time.



Bragging vs Sharing Success Stories: What’s the Difference?

Join us Sunday March 1st 10am ET to explore the difference between bragging vs sharing success stories. We generally think of bragging as negative and sharing success stories as positive inspiration and celebration. So how do they differ? Are there tangible elements that make them different or is it in the eyes and ears of the listeners?

Since communication is a huge part of interaction success, we explore this topic in people skills chat. Joining me as co-host is Christoph Trappe, a healthcare content marketing professional who also blogs about authentic storytelling.


Bragging vs Sharing Success Stories: Image is People skills logo

Bragging vs. Sharing Success Stories: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Bragging vs Sharing Success Stories

Join us in #Peopleskills global Twitter chat to share your perspective on bragging vs sharing success stories.


Here are some questions to get us thinking in advance:

  • How do you define success story? What is bragging?
  • Are they different? Is one bad and one good or neither? Pls. explain.
  • Why do people brag?
  • Bragging creates ___________________________.
  • If you’ve done it, it ain’t bragging. ~Walt Whitman Ag/Disagree?
  • What are benefits/risks of sharing success stories?
  • When do you feel most excited to share your own success stories?
  • What is the difference between you sharing your success story or others sharing it?
  • How does sharing your success story help/hurt others?
  • How can you share your success story without seeming like a braggard?
  • What role do people skills play in sharing success stories?



These are just some questions to get us thinking. Actual questions will post live during the chat.


Bring your experience, curiosity, a beverage, and join the community on Sunday March 1st 10am ET to offer your views on bragging vs sharing success stories.


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining the Google+ People Skills Community, The Facebook Group People Skills That Really Matter and the LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to be a part of all the people skills discussions everyday 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Out of Gratitude

Special thanks to Christoph Trappe for suggesting and co-hosting this topic with me!

My gratitude to all who participate and grow the people skills global community on Twitter (#peopleskills), Google+, LinkedIn, and Facebook. We welcome your suggestions for topics, offers to co-host, and most especially your diverse insights.

Continued thanks to generous chat moderators Chantal Bechervaise, Dave Moore, Hoda Maalouf, Tracy Shroyer, Jandis Price and Tom Rhodes for their time and contributions.






Hope you will all join people skills global Twitter chat (#peopleskills) this Sunday March 1st 2015, 10am ET/7am PT on bragging vs sharing success stories.

Everyone is welcome! We have only one rule in People Skills Global Chat: Respect for all even when we disagree.






TIP: If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Tweetchat.com, or Twubs.com and enter hashtag #peopleskills. Sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Tchat.io, Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Connect with you this Sun. March 1st, 2015, in #peopleskills global Twitter chat 10am ET on bragging vs sharing success stories.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!


From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

Social Media Etiquette: Beware the Impolite Polite Reminder

Etiquette matters. It affects how others see us. It affects what they think of us and whether they want to interact with us again. In careers and business, this could mean the difference between success and failure.

In networking when people don’t know each other, social media etiquette is even more important. The first impression we make may be the last impression we make!



Social media etiquette: Image is car w/license plate that says "hurry up".

Social media etiquette: Beware the Impolite Polite Reminder. Image by Michael Coghlan via Flickr.

Grateful for image by Michael Coghlan via Flickr Creative Commons License.


Social Media Etiquette: The Impolite Polite Reminder



What makes a bad impression?

  1. Being selfish. Do for others before you do for yourself.
  2. Accusing instead of understanding. Don’t jump to conclusions; jump into people’s hearts!
  3. Thinking you know better than others. Be a curious learner. Social media etiquette tip: Beware giving friendly advice without being asked.
  4. Presuming familiarity. In existing relationships, you can say certain things because there is trust. Before there is trust, the same things come across as impolite and rude. Social media etiquette tip: Take time to build trust.
  5. Being pushy. If people don’t respond, pushing them to respond leaves a terrible impression. Even if you call it a polite reminder, it is impolite. I received an unsolicited email about joining some association. When I didn’t respond, I received a second email reminding me that I hadn’t responded. The sender called it a polite reminder. It wasn’t. It was a turnoff.

    A reminder is only polite when someone has already said they were interested. Social media etiquette tip: Beware the impolite polite reminder. Not only is it rude, it comes across as pushy, manipulative, and inauthentic.



If you’re being pushy, it’s impolite no matter what you call it.




What impolite and polite people skills have you witnessed online?


From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related posts:
9 People Skills Reminders for Great Social Media Networking
Social Media Networking: Are You Using These People Skills

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

People Skills Excellence – Our Chat Topic.


WHEN/WHERE: Join us Sunday Feb 22nd, 2015 on Twitter at 10AM ET. Hashtag: #peopleskills


Time converter:
Please click the time converter link above to convert 10am ET to your local time.



People Skills Excellence – How to Develop It?

Join us Sunday Feb. 22nd 10am ET to explore people skills excellence. People skills feed success in business, careers, and relationships. Our ability to interact well affects our very lives. So what is people skills excellence and how do we develop it?




People Skills Excellence: Image is People skills logo

People Skills Excellence: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

People Skills Excellence: Why and How?

There are so many factors that contribute to how humans interact. Is it actually possible to achieve some level of people skills excellence? Really?

Some questions to get us thinking in advance of Sunday’s #Peopleskills global Twitter chat. If you want to suggest a question, please post it in the comments section below!

  • What is people skills excellence?
  • How are people skills important/unimportant in life?
  • When do they most affect you?
  • In such a diverse world, it is possible to achieve people skills excellence?
  • What is your reaction to someone who has poor people skills?
  • How do values and goals affect people skills development?
  • In search of people skills excellence – what are the most important steps?
  • Personality types: what impact does that have on developing people skills excellence?
  • What people skills have you developed in the past that help you the most now?
  • How can we achieve people skills excellence online?
  • What guidance would you give to someone who struggles with human interaction?
  • How does society help or hinder the development of people skills excellence?



These are just some questions to get us thinking. Actual questions will post live during the chat.


Bring your experience, curiosity, a beverage, and join the community on Sunday Feb. 22nd 10am ET to explore people skills excellence.


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining the Google+ People Skills Community, The Facebook Group People Skills That Really Matter and the LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to be a part of all the people skills discussions everyday 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Out of Gratitude

My gratitude to all who participate and grow the people skills global community on Twitter (#peopleskills), Google+, LinkedIn, and Facebook. We welcome your suggestions for topics, offers to co-host, and most especially your diverse insights.

Continued thanks to generous chat moderators Chantal Bechervaise, Dave Moore, Hoda Maalouf, Tracy Shroyer, Jandis Price and Tom Rhodes for their time and contributions.






Hope you will all join people skills global Twitter chat (#peopleskills) this Sunday Feb. 22nd 2015, 10am ET/7am PT people skills excellence.

Everyone is welcome! We have only one rule in People Skills Global Chat: Respect for all even when we disagree.






TIP: If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Tweetchat.com, or Twubs.com and enter hashtag #peopleskills. Sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Tchat.io, Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Connect with you this Sun. Feb. 22nd, 2015, in #peopleskills global Twitter chat 10am ET on people skills excellence.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

Modern Leadership & Teamwork: Selfless Giving Not Faceless Fortune

When you think of modern leadership, does the word selfless come to mind? So much is written about leaders doing more listening less speaking. Being more like a servant to the team and less like the supreme ruler.

As leaders face this definition of modern leadership, many start to wonder if selfless actually means faceless. Team members then face the same dilemma in defining teamwork.




Modern Leadership & Teamwork – This!

Modern Leadership & Teamwork: Image is diverse people working together.

Modern Leadership & Teamwork: Selfless Not Faceless Image by Doblin Monitor.

Grateful for image by: Doblin Monitor via Flickr Creative Commons License.



Not This!

Modern leadership & teamwork: Image is faceless mannequins.

Modern Leadership & Teamwork is Not Faceless. Image by Horla Varlan.

Grateful for image by: Horla Varlan via Flickr Creative Commons License.



Modern Leadership & Teamwork: Be Selfless Not Faceless

There are simple yet significant differences between selfless and faceless.

  1. Selfless leaders and teammates generously give their talents, ideas, and interest in others.

    Faceless believe their ideas aren’t worthy of consideration. Downside: What isn’t offered is unrealized success. Everyone matters for you never know who will contribute the winning detail.


  2. Selfless leaders and teammates share responsibility and accountability.

    Faceless hide from it all. Downside: Splintered organization and a culture of blame.


  3. Selfless leaders and teammates are confident and flexible.

    Modern leadership and teamwork is not about telling or asking. It’s knowing when to do each. Faceless lacks the confidence to do both.


  4. Selfless leaders and teammates seek first to understand then to be understood.

    Faceless seek only to understand. Downside: Groupthink. What isn’t discussed can be dangerous. This is far from modern leadership and teamwork.


  5. Selfless leaders and teammates express appreciation to each other.

    They realize there are many “I’s” in team. They honor and celebrate the diversity of talents. This encourages more contribution to the team. With new generations in the workplace, honoring individual contribution is critical. Faceless overlook the individuals. Downside: Missed opportunities to develop maximum contribution.


  6. Selfless leaders and teammates have tough conversations with respect and civility.

    They care about the outcome and each other. Faceless avoid the tough moments for their own comfort. Downside: Less successful organization.


Special Concerns for Leaders

If you are faceless …

  • you don’t inspire or engage team members.
  • team members can feel abandoned not empowered.
  • team members can believe they must act the same way you do.
  • team members can feel unappreciated and seek other employment.
  • teams members can feel like your organization is a dead end.
  • selfish team members can become the de facto leaders and unravel the culture of teamwork.



For modern leadership and teamwork, be selfless not faceless. Bring your generosity, talents, curiosity, courage, patience, and people skills to work every day. The result is a high performing organization that sustains success with inspiration, support, and stellar efforts.


Here’s a partner post w/ additional details: 12 Professional People Skills to Succeed Without Authority


What modern leadership & teamwork challenges have you met with selflessness?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
25 Team Member Talents to Celebrate & Appreciate
Leadership Interview Tips: I vs. We

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.


NEW> Increase productivity and reduce conflict with the new QUICK SPOT & ADAPT™ workshop to adapt to personality types and work better together. Book your workshop today!


 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

Great Customer Service Staff: Recruit These 15 Natural Traits

For years I have been able to spot job applicants who are naturally great at customer service. They excel at it. They have an ease, commitment, and skill that makes them great. They have a natural calling to serve others and they answer that call very well.



Recruit Naturally Great Customer Service Staff: Image is bright sun over ocean

Recruit Naturally Great Customer Service Staff. Image by Sea Turtle via Flickr.

Grateful for image by Sea Turtle via Flickr Creative Commons License.


Recruit Naturally Great Customer Service Staff

As more and more managers asked me how I picked naturally great customer service staff, I created this list of traits and behaviors. It was an interesting exercise to turn my people skills intuition into concrete traits you can unearth in interviews.

Here’s what the naturally great customer service staff do:

  1. Accept the absurdity of life without using sarcasm toward the customer.
  2. They easily adapt; their need for control is low.

  3. They listen with empathy.
  4. They brilliantly balance objectivity and caring.
  5. They initiate both caring and action. This is essential for dealing with upset customers.

  6. They know that they can’t change others — only their own perspectives and reactions. More importantly, they don’t want to change others.
  7. They love diversity. They are inspired and excited by it. They are non-judgmental.

  8. They exhibit a high sense of ownership and teamwork.
  9. They understand the big picture and show attention to detail; they follow-through.

  10. They see and hear far more than what the customer is saying and use it well.
  11. They continuously learn from interactions and quickly reapply this insight.

  12. They are self-confident not arrogant. They are comfortable with customers questioning their authority and influence appropriately.
  13. They have a thick skin and a warm heart. This makes them resilient and prevents them from burning out.

  14. They believe service and servitude are completely different. The first you choose; the second you don’t. They are proud to serve.
  15. They love to serve because of the giving — not to be liked or loved in return.


One caution: Be wary of job applicants who say they like customer service work because they like being appreciated. When the difficult customers are and the thank yous aren’t, these employees become frustrated and may do poorly. Customer service is about caring for others not about the customers caring for them.



Recruit and retain naturally great customer service staff by:

  • Understanding and believing that these people actually exist. Look in diverse pools of talent.
  • Using above list to hire friendly. Then train technically.
  • Giving them leeway in interacting with customers. Rigid scripts work against their natural talents.
  • Treating them with respect and trust. It sustains their natural talent.



You can easily trust and empower them to wow the customers. Since they are highly responsible and talented, the customer experiences the ultimate in care and action — in the moment, every time.

The consistently high quality service these great customer service staff deliver is your winning business advantage!



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
Customer Service Inspiration: The Secret Keys to Great Attitude
5 Powerful Beliefs to Win Over Rude Angry Customers
11 Wining Beliefs for Superior Customer Service Experience
Customer Service People Skills: 10 Non-Defensive Responses

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

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