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If you want career success, ask yourself what leaders and others actually see in you? Then realize that your own perspective is often very different than the outside view.

“O would some power the gift to give us to see ourselves as others see us.” ~Robert Burns

Beneath the exterior, what are they seeing, what are they missing, and what are they misinterpreting? Figure this out, fix it, and you will steer your career to personal happiness and success.

Do Your Own 360⁰ Inventory w/Family & Friends
Gather input from trusted family members who can be objective. Tap friends and people in different generations for their unbiased view.

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• Character. Ask them for one word to describe your characater and one example to illustrate it. Create this list and reflect on it. Is it what you expected? Is it you? From your perspective, what is missing? Is there a gap? Close the gap and you open the door to success.




• Beliefs. Ask them to tell you what your behavior and actions say about your beliefs and what you value.

  Actions speak louder than words. What do your actions tell others about your true values and view of a good life? Would leaders in your dream work tap you based on that view?

  If not, you may get trapped in the gap. Either show them those true values with your actions or consider what dream work matches your true values!
  
  The best career advice I ever got: First figure out what kind of life you want, then pick your career. For example, if you value a lifestyle of possessions and want to earn a living as an artist, there is a risk you will get trapped in the gap. How will you eliminate the gap?

  The most helpful personal insight I received: You value having a voice, living your values to help others through your work, and determining your own life path. (By the way, they were right.) My happiness and success started 23 years ago when I became self-employed.




• Talents and Natural Abilities. Ask them, what do you see as my natural abilities? Write them all down. See which ones show up multiple times. Is your current work truly drawing on these natural strengths?
  
  Which strength is hidden beneath your exterior? Your happiness will languish in your hidden strengths. Peel back the exterior and expose your hidden strength. Make note of where you use this strength in your personal life and it will guide you to your dream work where it naturally applies.

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The sum of your character, beliefs, and talents becomes your personal career portfolio for finding success and happiness.

Your portfolio is you. It goes beyond letters of recommendation, references, and a resume.

Whether you are unsure about what you want, already working in your desired career, or transitioning to your dream work, peel away the exterior layers to find who you really are and show them what you can truly do.

There is nothing quite as sublime as living an authentic life.

What is the best career or life tip you ever received or offered?

Will you grace us with it in the comments section below?

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
Want happiness? Don’t Let Fear Be the Gum on Your Shoe!
5 Psychologically Uncomfortable Career Shaping Opportunities

©2012 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.

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Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

As The People-Skills Coach™, leaders often ask me why they haven’t been able to engage employees.

In many cases, I discover that their attitude and communication is one of several reasons. In fact, there are 5 legacy attitudes to replace for employee engagement.

I see leaders holding on to these legacy attitudes when they are solely focused on results and not the teams who must get there. They also do it when they assume that the people they lead are just like them.

These leaders succeed when they shift their philosophical beliefs. They engage employees much better once they see that people are diverse and that employee engagement does not block, reduce, or delay results.

Employee engagement drives results through inspiration and nourishes commitment to the highest quality, best results.

Your communication, people-skills, and interpersonal connection engage with employees to that end.


Leaders, Replace These 5 Legacy Attitudes to Engage Employees

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• Prove me wrong. Although this sounds like an inspirational challenge to employees, it also smacks of the legacy attitude — “I, the leader, am right until or unless you prove me wrong.” Change the focus from you to the idea in question. Engage employees around ideas and results, not around you.




• “If that’s all you can do.” As changes in business require new skills of employees, they often struggle with how to stay competent and feel competent. On more than one occasion, I have heard managers say to these concerned employees, “well if that’s all you can do … ” (meaning their current skill).

  This legacy attitude of questioning employees’ competence does not make them work harder. The issue is not effort; it’s skill redevelopment. They are already concerned about their continued competence. Lift them up and engage them with diverse opportunities to learn new skills. Disdain does not engage!







The Assembly Line Approach to Leading People

• No news is good news. This not-so-golden legacy nugget is based on the idea that employees should routinely do what they are initially told until further orders arrive. Yikes – the assembly line approach to people! Can’t you just picture the little people widgets rolling along?

  Meanwhile, communicating engages employees for best results. It gives them information about focus and purpose, and it inspires commitment to results. Engage with knowledge on how the company makes money. Offer worthy kudos for their specific talents that contributed to the end results.

Communicating how employees’ contributions advance the company’s greatness, nourishes greatness. Anaerobic bacteria are the only things that grow in a vacuum; people and businesses don’t.




• Work things out for yourselves – you’re adults. Leaders who want to focus primarily on end results often side step team issues under the guise of empowerment. One recent article (the URL for which I cannot find at this moment) claims we should “take the bubble wrap off employees” and let them work everything out themselves.

  Leaders, aren’t you employees too? Why not share your special insight to help reduce conflict and re-engage the team on the end result?

  When you overlook team issues, success overlooks your teams. Abandonment is not a success strategy.
  
  

• If you don’t see me doing it, don’t do it. Wow — the Simons Says approach to 21st century success. Leaders, will this attract top talent to your team? It might get you obedient followers but that burdens you with creating all the success.
  
  If you want collaborative innovators who use their talent and acumen to produce success — replace Simon Says with something at least at the level of Pictionary! It’s much more engaging. (What game would you suggest?)

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If your personality or experience makes you highly engaged and focused on results, you may make the classic mistake of assuming all employees are just as engaged. Yet if they were you wouldn’t wonder why they aren’t.

Focus on the reality of today’s leadership requirements. Engage employees through knowledge of the business, training, appreciation, and accountability to draw out maximum contribution to the best end results.

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™


Related Post: Leaders, Take This Pain Free Journey to Engaging Employee Accountability

©2012 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please first email info@katenasser.com for terms of use. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.

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Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on customer service & experience, teamwork, employee engagement, and leading change. Kate turns interaction obstacles into business success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

People often focus on major career shaping milestones like earning a degree or relocating for a better job. It’s harder to see the psychologically uncomfortable career shaping opportunities yet well worth the effort.

When leaders and managers must decide who to place on new projects, in newly vacated job spots, and in managerial and leadership posts, they draw on their everyday observations of staff behavior. How you behave in difficult and uncomfortable situations creates an impression that shapes your career opportunities.


5 Psychologically Uncomfortable Career Shaping Opportunities

• When You’re the New Kid on the Block. Moving onto an existing team can be uncomfortable. How will your expertise be received before you’ve had time to build trust? If you are adept at asserting without pushing, leaders see you as an asset to critical collaborations and sudden teams.




• When Deadlines Loom and You Have Little Information. These situations can challenge your sense of self-confidence and competence. If you perform well without blaming other groups for the void, leaders see you as a resourceful asset worthy of trust for tough high profile assignments.




• When You’re On a Toxic Negative Team. Do you succumb to the negativity — even if just to fit in? Or are you the lonely voice of inspiration that holds strong and re-inspires others? If you inspire in the face of naysayers, leaders see you as the turnaround titan that keeps productivity flowing.




• When Emotions Are Running High. Many people hate conflict. Avoiding it impacts results. Fueling it can be disastrous. If your focus and insight triumphs over emotion, you pop to the top of the next leader list!




• During Rapid Start-ups. Start-ups present a huge revenue and public relations challenge to companies. The learning curve is an expense. Delay is risky. The stress of these start-ups crushes many people. If you are a fast fearless learner undaunted by a lack of structured training programs, leaders see you as pure profit and risk reduction.

What does it take to develop these traits and seize these opportunities?

1. Desire
2. Persistence
3. Continuous improvement

You can strengthen your ability to blend into new teams, handle ambiguity, stay inspired, improve focus, and embrace fast change. In fact, you can achieve most anything you desire.

Leaders will notice; confidence and commitment burns bright.

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™

Related Post: Be & Perform Like a Ferrari

©2012 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please first email info@katenasser.com for terms of use. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.

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Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on customer service, customer experience, teamwork, and leading change. She turns interaction obstacles into business success. Masters in Organizational Psychology. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

As The People-Skills Coach™, I have written before on steps from brutally blunt to helpfully honest. Yet for those who are inspired by logic to change behavior, it bears listing the smart logical reasons why bluntness bombs out.

5 Smart Logical Reasons Blunt Bombs Out

1. No Warm-Up. Picture your bluntness as very cold water. If we push someone into a cold swimming pool, they remember the shock. If we let them wade in, they adjust to the temperature and can function. Thus if we want people to function and use our message, we shouldn’t shock them with bluntness.




2. Punching Dulls the Brain. Punching bags are not known for their performance. They hang and swing. If we are being blunt to effect a change, those we verbally punch may swing away from us yet they are not likely to understand or change behavior.




3. Bluntness builds barriers. Communication is for connection. Bluntness can create a busy signal — a barrier — between communicator and listener. If someone isn’t listening, your message bombs out.




4. Bluntness undermines respect and credibility. The strength of the message is weakened by the rudeness of the approach. Who is going to respect and believe the message delivered by a blunt creton?




5. Bluntness breaks bonds. Unless we each live as hermits, we interact with people to survive and thrive. Many times the same people more than once. Bluntness may get our words out but bombs out by breaking the bonds with those around us. It may even create vengeful feelings and instigate a war (verbal or hidden).

Many people resort to bluntness, out of frustration, when diplomatic honesty hasn’t worked. Others simply lose patience with those of less intelligence.

Yet when we reach the end of the rope, why cut it with bluntness? Unless we need to use bluntness to save a life or prevent death, hold on to the rope!

Take a moment and tap intellect, logic, and smarts to find a way to communicate with honesty and respect.

From my experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™


Related Post: Leadership & Teamwork: Honesty May Hurt But Blunt Burns Forever

©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.

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Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™, delivers consulting, training, DVDs, and keynotes on customer service, teamwork, and leading change. She turns interaction obstacles into business success in tough times of change. See this site for workshop outlines and customer results.

Most everyone, new graduates and experienced workers,  want a  career RISE.  To succeed, connect into the true meaning of these four people-skills traits.

The deeper you understand, embrace, and develop these 4 people-skills traits, the more valuable you become to the business and the boss — decision makers, executives, and managers.

R – Reliability. We think of this mostly as deliver what you promise and/or what you are assigned. That’s expected not exceptional.

For a career rise, connect into personality styles of the leaders’ you work for and with.
Understand their hot buttons and stay a step ahead of their needs.
Know when/how to point out the risk of their view or impending decision.
Facilitate their actions to make the business successful and help them prevent the failures.

I – Integrity. Hold professional confidences, behave ethically, be accountable for your actions and energy, correct your mistakes without excuses, give more than is asked or expected. Integrity builds trust and trust delivers long term career success.

S – Self-confidence. Less neediness and more initiative from you make life easier for your boss.

What it is: Strength in tough times, comfort adapting to change, insight on how your talent and experience apply to new and different situations, collaboration without fear of losing your own individual success, managing your own ego.

What it isn’t: False bravado, know-it-all thinking, who’s better than whom attitude, disdain for diversity.

E – Excellence. Pursue excellence through constant learning, innovation, and honest self-evaluation. When you are always learning and accurately assessing needed improvements you give the company (and the boss) more ROI for its decision to hire you.

What is your ROI for developing these 4 people-skills traits? Career success.

The executive’s trust in you and reliance on your contributions is the catapult for your career rise and long term success. Imagine a boss saying “I’ve never met anyone I can rely on more” — and then get that designation!


What other traits and actions have given RISE to your career? Please share your voice in the comments section below. It can help many.

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™

©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.

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Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™, delivers people-skills workshops, keynotes, and consultations that take you and your teams from inspiration to action. Combining humor, practicality, and a passion for excellence, Kate re-inspires success in all those she touches. See this site for customers’ comments and book Kate now.

As a coach, I specialize in transitions to help professionals meet some specific goal.  The transitions are from one behavior to another to achieve something new, different, or more.  

Some recent examples: 

• A Help Desk manager who wanted to be more assertive after receiving performance feedback in that light.
• A manager who wanted and needed better presentation skills for many aspects of her job.   She found the coaching fun and productive. 
• A systems analyst who wanted to relocate from the east coast to New Mexico and live a very different life.  She did not know where to begin to have this new life.   She is there now!
• A big thinker type – great at generating ideas, brainstorming, and creativity – needed to communicate with more focus.  The big thinker now uses an email template we created to communicate for impact. 

Why tap a coach?  Transitions from one behavior to another require more than just learning a new skill.    For most, it means overcoming blocks that stop learning and change.   There are many books out there about changing your career, your life, your outlook.  Ever read one and still no change?  As a coach, I inspire you to action!

ASK Kate!  This blog gives you the opportunity to pose your transition questions to me directly and get transition steps at no cost — until the end of March 2009.   I have extended this offer through the end of April 2009 to include followups to the International Help Desk Conference.   Many don’t want to post their questions here preferring instead to email me.   Either way is fine.

Let’s get started … Kate Nasser