communication

Creativity Culture: How to Create Safe Open Engagement

Three years into running people skills global Twitter chat, I am thrilled with how many strangers from around the globe come together and engage openly. Recently, one newcomer said he was grateful I had created a safe open place to interact.


His gratitude made me reflect on what I had done and what others did to make this happen. Here is what we did to create an open creativity culture! It applies to workplaces as well.



Creativity Culture: Image is graphic with word creativity.

Creativity Culture: Keys to Creating Safe Place to Engage. Image by Sweet Dreamz Design via Flickr.

Image by Sweet Dreamz Design via Flickr Creative Commons License.

Creativity Culture: 7 Keys to Create Safe Open Engagement

Leaders and managers can do much to create a safe open place for everyone to engage and create.

  1. Create a simple powerful rule about respect.

    Respect is the key to feeling safe to engage, share, and create. In people skills global Twitter chat, we use one rule: Respect even when we disagree. Civility doesn’t weaken the message. It helps others to hear it.


  2. Listen!

    One of the strongest ways to show respect is to listen. It doesn’t mean obey; it doesn’t mean agree. It says respect for all.


  3. Ask questions to understand vs. judging people to discount ideas.

    We open our minds through questions and discussion. Assessing and deciding comes after that.



  4. Celebrate diversity.

    Applaud very different ideas. Appreciating diverse views doesn’t mean we agree. It means we are open to learning and creating.


  5. Moderate extremes.

    Moderation doesn’t mean mediocrity. It means balancing the needs of many in your creativity culture. If we see moderation as mediocrity, we seek excellence only in extremes — and miss the brilliance in between. Extremes spring up from strong vision and mission, predominance of any one personality type, and high pressure points.


  6. Encourage self-awareness.

    Help everyone identify their own pet peeves and own them. Help them see their talents and brilliance and share them. With this step, you replace a shortage mentality with one of abundance and curiosity.


  7. Identify slip ups early.

    The first six keys mean little if we don’t use them. This means spotting slip ups early on and calling everyone to a high level again.


Fostering a creativity culture where it’s safe to engage is not difficult. If we can bring strangers from around the globe every Sunday morning to engage in people skills Twitter chat, leaders and managers can surely foster the same thing in smaller teams. As long as they see it as important to interaction, they can make it happen.



Your View: What would you add to this list on creating safe open place to engage?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Post:
Innovation Leadership: Make It Easier to Innovate Than to Complain
Moderation Doesn’t Mean Mediocrity
Leadership: Do You Seek Excellence Only in Extremes?

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.



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Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Be Treated Respectfully: How to Respond to Disrespect

What would you say to someone who is disrespecting you? How would you respond to pushy people who show no consideration for your view?

Would you take offense, get angry, and tell them off? Would you say nothing and simmer in anger? Would you walk away and avoid them in the future? There is a better way.



Be Treated Respectfully: Image is hand up in front of the sun.

Be Treated Respectfully: Set Limits w/ Pushy People Image by: _RedHeat

Image by _RedHeat via Flickr Creative Commons License.


How to Set Limits on Disrespect & Be Treated Respectfully

There are many ways to behave in the face of disrespect. In one off interactions, you might ignore it realizing you will never see that person again. You value your serenity and believe in yourself so why bother with it.

Yet when it happens with people you will be around frequently, ignoring disrespect can undermine healthy relationships. You overlook it, remain silent and one day your anger erupts when you’ve had enough. The offender then says “why didn’t you tell me sooner?”



To respond to disrespect and be treated respectfully …

  1. Calmly and firmly say: “Stop. You will not speak to me that way” or “Stop. Please do not speak to me that way.”
  2. Continue with: “I show you basic respect. I ask the same in return.”


If the offender is your boss at work and you cannot respond this way, calmly say: “You have my full attention even without yelling. I am actually more productive that way.” It’s respectful; it communicates commitment; it educates them on your needs.

In both instances you have a dual purpose: Set limits and be treated respectfully. The bonus is that you help others see beyond their own needs. Picture this image of mutual respect and communicate with calm confidence.



Be Treated Respectfully: Image is handshake.

Be Treated Respectfully: Image by Casa Thomas Jefferson via Flickr.

Image by Casa Thomas Jefferson via Flickr Creative Commons License


Confident communication is key to being treated respectfully. Initially the offenders may claim you took it the wrong way. Others may apologize to you and thank you for telling them (yes it does happen). Either way, you have set limits by showing respect for yourself and them — not by yelling. It works.




What successes have you had in setting limits? Please share with us!



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
Are You Brutally Blunt or Helpfully Honest
The Perfect Apology and the ONE Word That Destroys It
11 Steps to Being Authentic Without Scaring People Away

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.


QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Leaders and managers, have you ever wanted to tell employees to grow up? You’re not alone. Even companies as a whole report that recent graduates and new hires don’t have sufficient critical thinking and teamwork skills. These are but two aspects of employee maturity. 


The truth is, for employees to contribute maturely leaders and managers must mentor a mature understanding of the business and of the collaboration needed to succeed.


Saying “grow up” won’t do it. Reflecting what you want them to do is the first step to great mentoring. Ask yourself what were they doing that brought you to say grow up? Itemize what you want them to do.



Nine Chances to Cultivate Maturity Image by:J.G. in S.F.

Image by JG in SF via Flickr Creative Commons License.

9 Chances to Cultivate Employee Maturity

Maturity is about balance, readiness, consideration, and confidence. It’s about attitudes as well as skills.

  1. When addressing employee concerns and complaints, always speak about the impact on the business. Today it’s popular to focus on changing the workplace to engage employees. If you want maturity in the workplace, balance caring for them with expectations of them.

  2. Illustrate the difference between honesty with diplomacy and rude bluntness. The former is a sign of maturity for it balances the message and the impact when selecting the words. The latter is a sign of selfish immaturity.

  3. Applaud, highlight, and reinforce excellence. When you set and reward a high standard, you mentor and develop that level of mature commitment. If you treat basic behaviors (like meeting objectives or showing up on time) as something special, you keep many in the weeds.

  4. Replace the misguided adage “treat each other like customers” with the more mature team mantra “grow and change to reach a shared success and common goal”. Team maturity has a deeper honesty and type of trust that surpasses that of a business and its customers. Cultivate it from the beginning and you cultivate maturity.

  5. Frequently ask, “what are we each doing to be ready for tomorrow?” When leaders pose this question, it asks employees to initiate some of their own growth. It is a call to maturity. Provide training and opportunities for them to develop further.

  6. Within a certain sphere, make it OK to make mistakes. Confidence grows when mistakes are lessons learned. Sometimes maturity comes from jumping a hurdle and knowing how to prevent a crash next time.

  7. Maturity owns the impact of behavior. Show them how to do it even in difficult moments. Related post: The Perfect Apology and The ONE Word That Destroys It.

  8. Give them access to situations that cultivate a mature open mind. In silos, employees continue to focus on their own jobs or possibly on the silo they are in. When you break through the silos and have employees see the bigger picture, their view of their own job matures. Now they can contribute to the whole not just to the silo..

  9. Think out loud. Employees learn critical thinking by hearing it and participating in it. If you want to speed this aspect of maturity, show them how you arrive at decision vs. just telling them the decision.


Most of all leaders, continue to evolve your self-awareness and maturity. Your growth spurs theirs. It expands this list of nine chances all the way to infinite. Highlight and applaud growth. You get what you focus on. If you want employees to stretch and grow, recognize and reinforce growth. If you focus only on results, who are you actually leading and mentoring to achieve those results?



What other ways can you develop employee maturity?



From my experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
Employee Appreciation: Be a Buoy to Be Appreciated
5 Immature Extremes That Harm Teamwork

©2011-2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.


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Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Team Dynamics: Extremes That Harm Teamwork People Skills


Team Dynamics: Image is stormy waters on rocks.

Team Dynamics: 5 Extremes That Harm Interaction & People Skills

Image by Daniele Berlucci via Flickr Creative Commons License.

Team Dynamics: Eliminate These 5 Extremes for Great Interaction

  1. Labels and fixed definitions. Sometimes team members thinking gets stuck on labels and fixed definitions. As teams try to innovate and deal with change, individuals who think literally or hold on to their fixed definitions unsettle team dynamics. Example: I wrote a blog post, Holacracy: Why Employees Like Hierarchy, and two people lectured me on how I didn’t understand holacracy. They were stuck on a fixed definition of holacracy and couldn’t see past it. If they did that to their colleagues in a team meeting, you can imagine the tension between those who were stuck in their definition and those who wanted to explore the topic.

  2. Gotcha behavior. Leaders and team members who revel in pointing out others’ mistakes damage trust. Some even go so far as to set people up to see if they make mistakes. If they do, the gotcha gang points out their errors. They then take credit for educating them. Trust and team dynamics suffer.

  3. Sidelines driving. Picture one team member handling a difficult situation. Other team members who are not directly involved criticize from the sidelines. Share your knowledge but don’t tell others what to do. It’s not just what you say that matters — it’s how you say it. Team up don’t gang up!


  4. Hearing either/or when it doesn’t exist. Team interaction thrives on great listening. When team members hear and think either/or when others are not saying it, it harms team dynamics. Example: In a Twitter #DareToBe chat on curiosity, I tweeted “self-reliance fuels a curious mind.”

    Someone responded directly to me, “I respectfully disagree. Collaboration feeds curiosity, helps it grow, deepens questioning.” Interesting comment. I never said, “self-reliance, alone, fuels a curious mind.” She heard an either/or that I never implied. I believe there are many things that fuel curiosity and I nicely tweeted that back to her.


  5. Absolutes and know-it-all behavior. Rigid team members who insist that their views or positions are right damage team dynamics and results. Their behavior is the opposite of teamwork. Great listening and adaptability is the hallmark of positive team dynamics.



How can leaders help teams prevent or minimize these extremes? Invest time in having the team define positive team behaviors. Discuss what to do if extremes develop. Use team role plays to help each team member become more accountable for their own extremes and self-correct them. I would be pleased to deliver these sessions and work with your teams on positive team dynamics.


Your turn: What other extreme behaviors damage interaction and team dynamics?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
11 Steps to Be Authentic & Not Scare People Away
Leadership: 18 Things Respected Well-Liked Leaders Consistently Do

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.


QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Random Acts of Kindness: People Skills Global Chat Topic

WHEN: Sunday June 28, 2015 at 10AM EDT on Twitter. Hashtag: #peopleskills


Background on This Chat Topic: Random Acts of Kindness

Kindness can melt the hardest heart. It can reach around the globe without boarding a plane. Its power seems infinite. JOIN us Sunday June 28, 2015 10amEDT in people skills global Twitter chat to discuss random acts of kindness. Guest hosting this chat for me is Chantal Bechveraise @CBechervaise. Many thanks Chantal!



Random Acts of Kindness: Image is People skills logo

Random Acts of Kindness: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Random Acts of Kindness: Why and How

JOIN us in #Peopleskills global Twitter chat to share random acts of kindness.

Here are some questions to get us thinking in advance. Actual questions will post live during the chat.

  • How do you define kindness?
  • Where does kindness get its power?
  • How do kindness and generosity relate?
  • What is significant about ‘random’ acts of kindness?
  • When has kindness touched you in a powerful and deep way?
  • What effects do random acts of kindness have on humanity?
  • When are people most likely to perform random acts of kindness?
  • Do random acts of kindness have to be anonymous or private to be effective? Pls. expl.
  • How do personal or social values foster or hinder random acts of kindness?
  • What acts of kindness can leaders show at work and why?
  • What people skills do we need to do random acts of kindness?


So bring your personal perspective, your favorite beverage, and join the people skills global chat community this Sunday June 28, 2015 10am EDT in Twitter (hashtag: #peopleskills) on random acts of kindness.


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining the Google+ People Skills Community and the LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to be a part of all the people skills discussions everyday 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Out of Gratitude

My gratitude to all who participate and grow the people skills global chat community on Twitter (#peopleskills), Google+, and LinkedIn. We welcome your suggestions for topics, offers to co-host, and most especially your individual insights.

Special thanks to guest host Chantal Bechervaise and generous chat moderators Dave Moore, Hoda Maalouf, Jandis Price, and Tom Rhodes for their time and insightful contributions.






Hope you will all join People Skills Global Chat on Twitter #peopleskills this Sunday June 28, 2015 10am EDT/7am PDT to share random acts of kindness.

Everyone is welcome! We have only one rule in People Skills Global Chat: Respect for all even when we disagree.







TIP: If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Twubs.com or Tweetchat.com, enter hashtag #peopleskills, and sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Tchat.io, Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Chat with you this Sun. June 28th, 2015 10am EDT in People Skills Global Chat on Twitter (#peopleskills) TOPIC: Random Acts of Kindness.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!


From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

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Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

Leadership Success: The Real Challenge is Balance Not Achievement


Which one of these images do you picture when you think of leadership success?



Leadership Success: Image is cross beams in tall building.

Leadership Success: Balance Beam Not Mountain Top. Image by Ben Rogers via Flickr.

Leadership Success: Not Just Mountain Top






















For many it is getting to the mountain top. Everyday phrases like, at the top of your game and reach the summit, express what many believe about leadership success.

They focus on initiative and drive which are necessary and valuable. Yet the real challenge in leadership — and life — is balance. Achievement is easy compared to balance.


Leadership Success: Think Balance Beam Not Just Mountain Top

  • Consider the greatest challenge for most businesses — managing growth. This is an issue of balance: projections, investment, supply, demand, etc… Yet many continue to act as if they’re still in start-up mode and focus on climbing to the top.

  • Consider one of the greatest global challenges of any business — optimizing diverse cultures. This too is about balance. Understanding, embracing, and adapting to all factors that can enhance or topple success.

  • Developing high performance teams is about balance. Leaders must get diverse personality types, occupations, ages, and educational levels to work together.

  • Engaging employees for ownership, accountability, and commitment, requires balance. Leaders must balance telling and asking. Great leaders know when to do each.

  • Balancing humility and signs of outward strength is essential. Too much strength and leaders seem domineering. Too much humility and they seem weak. If you struggle with the idea of humility in leadership, read: Never confuse humility for humiliation.

  • In communicating to improve employee engagement and commitment, leaders must balance candor and care. High level leaders often need to add more care to their candor. Front line leaders often need to add more candor to their care.



Unfortunately, somewhere many have learned that focusing on balance is the same as maintaining the status quo. It isn’t! When you have balance, you can move faster, perform better, and adapt to change more easily — without tumbling down.


Essential list of things to balance for leadership success:

  • Intuition and data
  • Safety and risk
  • Big picture and details
  • Creative thinking and critical thinking
  • Practicality and inspiration
  • Reflective listening and active expression



What else do leaders need to balance? Please add your perspective to this list.



You can ascend and master the balance beam of leadership success. Develop it throughout your career long before you have the title of leader!


From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
Moderation Doesn’t Mean Mediocrity!
Leadership Success: 18 Things Respected Well-Liked Leaders Consistently Do

Mountain top image licensed via Istock.com.
Balance beam image by Ben Rogers via Flickr Creative Commons License.

©2012-2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.




QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Introverts and Extroverts: People Skills Global Chat Topic.

WHEN: Sunday June 21, 2015 at 10AM EDT on Twitter. Hashtag: #peopleskills


Background on This Chat Topic: Interaction Between Introverts and Extroverts

There are many myths about introverts and extroverts as well as challenges when they interact. JOIN us Sunday June 21, 2015 10amEDT as we explore communication between introverts and extroverts.



Introverts and Extroverts: Image is People skills logo

Introverts and Extroverts: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Introverts and Extroverts: Myths, Truths, and Interaction

JOIN us in #Peopleskills global Twitter chat to explore interaction between introverts and extroverts.

Here are some questions to get us thinking in advance. Actual questions will post live during the chat.

  • What is an introvert? Extrovert?
  • I identify myself as an introvert, extrovert, or ______________. Why?
  • I am happiest when ____________________.
  • What are some assumptions about introverts and extroverts?
  • Where is extroversion helpful? When is introversion helpful?
  • They say opposites attract. Is this true w/ introverts and extroverts?
  • What are some advantages of interacting w/ people different from you?
  • What are the challenges of interacting with different types?
  • How can introverts and extroverts learn more about each other’s type and preferences?
  • Considering personality type and job success, are there certain jobs that are a better fit for each? Pls. explain.
  • How do people skills help you adapt to different types?


So bring your personal perspective, your favorite beverage, and join the people skills global chat community this Sunday June 21, 2015 10am EDT in Twitter (hashtag: #peopleskills) on introverts and extroverts.


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining the Google+ People Skills Community and the LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to be a part of all the people skills discussions everyday 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Out of Gratitude

My gratitude to all who participate and grow the people skills global chat community on Twitter (#peopleskills), Google+, and LinkedIn. We welcome your suggestions for topics, offers to co-host, and most especially your individual insights.

Special thanks to generous chat moderators Dave Moore, Hoda Maalouf, Jandis Price, Chantal Bechervaise and Tom Rhodes for their time and insightful contributions.






Hope you will all join People Skills Global Chat on Twitter #peopleskills this Sunday June 21, 2015 10am EDT/7am PDT to share insights on introverts and extroverts.

Everyone is welcome! We have only one rule in People Skills Global Chat: Respect for all even when we disagree.







TIP: If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Twubs.com or Tweetchat.com, enter hashtag #peopleskills, and sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Tchat.io, Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Chat with you this Sun. June 21st, 2015 10am EDT in People Skills Global Chat on Twitter (#peopleskills) TOPIC: Interaction Between Introverts and Extroverts.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.


QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Change Leadership: How to Sustain Morale When Aborting a Difficult Project

When you read this title, you might be inclined to think everyone would be relieved to see the difficult project disappear. Why would you need to address and sustain morale? In very difficult projects, employees who endure and perform well do so with deep commitment. When you pull the plug and abort the project, their morale can crash.



Change leadership addresses morale to re-inspire employees for the next challenge.



Change Leadership: Image is an electric cord unplugged.

Change Leadership: Addressing Morale When You Pull the Plug

Image by Kipp baker via Flickr Creative Commons License.


Change Leadership: What do employees feel and how can you help them?

When a very difficult project is cut short, the employees who were truly committed can feel:

  1. Used like rats in a maze
  2. Sacrificed for nothing
  3. Cheated from the finish line
  4. Unappreciated for their extra effort
  5. Failure and responsible for it
  6. Angry over being excluded from the decision

If you want your change leadership efforts to be successful in this moment, you must address these feelings and what leads up to them.



What Happens to Employees Psychologically During a Very Difficult Project

Employees who rise to a difficult challenge, endure, and perform well do so by believing that:

  • Nothing is impossible
  • Teamwork can conquer any challenge
  • Sacrificing their comfort and personal time will be worth it at the end
  • They will all share in the sweet rewards of success

In other words, they rule out the possibility of failure to keep themselves going. Think of the US Marines motto: “Surrender is not in our creed.” Many times employees have subconsciously adopted this belief. Then suddenly you abort the project and their morale crashes.



Change Leadership: Steps to Address Morale

  • Most importantly, communicate through the project so that employees’ expectations adjust along the way. More information, more reality, less shock.
  • Do not blame the team. Sometimes leaders will blame a whole team when slackers slowed success. Yet great leaders address under-performers along the way. They don’t wait and they don’t blame the whole team.
  • If possible, let them be involved in or at least have access to the decision making process.
  • Draw everyone together and discuss what has happened. Often issues were beyond their control. Get their thoughts. Highlight the talents and efforts applied and ask them to add their kudos of each other to this discussion.
  • In a separate team meeting, discuss the lessons learned. If you do the lessons learned in the first meeting, they may interpret it as “failure analysis”. Much better to let them heal with a celebration of talent and then look at lessons learned after that.
  • Use this change to explore, teach, and develop the team’s agility. I can help you with this!


Great change leadership stems from emotional intelligence that inspires and cares for employees. It’s not fluff. It’s the tangible steps to re-inspiring and re-engaging employees after a crushing blow. Pull the plug without unplugging employees’ drive and resilience!



Your Turn: What other change leadership actions will sustain morale?



How can these difficult moments build a team’s agility?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts
10 Ways to Ignite Greatness Without Leaving Scars
Thriving in Change: 7 Certainties to Replace Every Regret
5 Steps to Develop Emotional Intelligence

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.


QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Second Chances Is Our People Skills Global Twitter Chat Topic.

WHEN: Sunday June 7, 2015 at 10AM EDT. Hashtag: #peopleskills


Background on This Chat Topic: Second Chances

Mistakes happen. Disagreements arise. At work and in life, what brings people together or keeps them apart again after difficulties? JOIN us Sunday June 7, 2015 as we explore second chances.



Second Chances: Image is People skills logo

Second Chances: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.


Second Chances – When, Why, and How?

If life is learning, what makes the idea of second chances so hard to embrace? Is it mostly about trust? Does it take courage to give someone a second chance? JOIN us in this #peopleskills global Twitter chat to explore the dynamics of second chances in your professional and personal life.

Some questions to get us thinking in advance. Actual questions will post live during the chat.

  • What feelings does the phrase ‘second chance’ evoke in you?
  • Should there be a limit on how many chances we give people?
  • In what conditions would you not offer someone a second chance? Why?
  • What stops us from giving people a second chance?
  • How is trust related to second chances?
  • If you give someone a second chance and they fail you again, how do you feel and how do you deal with it?
  • Where or when were you grateful to get a second chance?
  • How does it benefit a business to give employees a second chance at success?
  • Does giving someone a second chance paint you as a fool? Why/why not?
  • How can people skills minimize the risks we feel in giving someone a second chance?


So bring your personal perspective, your favorite beverage, and join the people skills global chat community this Sunday June 7, 2015 10am EDT on Twitter (hashtag: #peopleskills) to explore second chances.


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining the Google+ People Skills Community and the LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to be a part of all the people skills discussions everyday 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Out of Gratitude

My gratitude to all who participate and grow the people skills global chat community on Twitter (#peopleskills), Google+, and LinkedIn. We welcome your suggestions for topics, offers to co-host, and most especially your individual insights.

Special thanks to generous chat moderators Dave Moore, Hoda Maalouf, Tracy Shroyer, Jandis Price, Chantal Bechervaise and Tom Rhodes for their time and insightful contributions.






Hope you will all join People Skills Global Chat on Twitter #peopleskills this Sunday June 7, 2015 10am EDT/7am PDT to explore the dynamics of second chances.

Everyone is welcome! We have only one rule in People Skills Global Chat: Respect for all even when we disagree.







TIP: If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Twubs.com or Tweetchat.com, enter hashtag #peopleskills, and sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Tchat.io, Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Chat with you this Sun. June 7th, 2015 10am EDT in People Skills Global Chat on Twitter (#peopleskills) TOPIC: Second Chances.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

People Skills Image: Do People See You as Open-Minded or Argumentative?

Questions open communication. They unearth expectations. They minimize conflict while working through disagreements. They can make you seem open-minded and highly interested. That’s a great people skills image.

Questions can also make you seem argumentative and always contrary. What makes the difference?



People Skills Image: Image is picture of question marks.

People Skills Image: Argumentative vs Probing. Image by Valerie Everett via Flickr.

Image by Valerie Everett via Flickr Creative Commons License.



People Skills Image: Open-minded vs. Argumentative & Contrary

  1. Open-minds ask open-ended questions. Who, what, when, how explore others’ views. Argumentative questions load to one position. “Don’t you think” vs. “What do you think.”

  2. Open-minds know when not to ask questions. There are times to let people talk without questioning them for details. They may be upset and need to vent. They may be overwhelmed and trying to talk it out. Not asking questions at that moment honors their needs. Else you seem argumentative and insensitive — not a good people skills image.

  3. Open-minds love to question and discover new views that change theirs. They seek clarity and possibilities vs. being right. “Where can you take me and/or where can we go together?”

  4. Open-minds show interest. Argumentative/contrary questions say “prove it to me.” How you word “why” questions makes the difference. For example, “I’m interested to know why” shows interest. “Why do you think this?” often sounds argumentative and judgmental. Not so great a people skills image.

  5. Open-minds sometimes agree. Argumentative and contrary almost always raise the opposing view. Do you know people like this? They may even pride themselves on being that way. Yet it distances them from others and grows old quickly. It can be very damaging to a career! The people skills image and message is arrogance and disconnect.


Results require open-minded relationships. Asking for feedback and reflecting on how you come across to others is a simple and powerful way to refine your people skills and sustain great relationships. It impacts teamwork, collaboration, leadership, employee engagement, and customer experience.




What open-ended questions have expanded your view? Where can I take you?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

End Bullying is People Skills Twitter Chat Rally – Sunday May 31, 2015 10am EDT.

Hashtag: #peopleskills

Here’s a time converter to assist all of you around the globe in converting 10am ET to your local time.

Background on People Skills Chat – Rally to End Bullying

Once each quarter we dedicate our #Peopleskills global Twitter chat hour to end bullying.

In this rally, we use our intellect, hearts, and voices to explore the more subtle aspects of bullying to end it in its tracks. Please spread the word and invite others to join us on Twitter Sunday May 31, 2015 10am ET using Hashtag: #peopleskills.


End Bullying: Image is People skills logo

End Bullying: Image by KimbManson for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.

Image designed by: Kimb Manson Graphics Design for Kate Nasser. All rights reserved.


People Skills Twitter Chat – Rally to End Bullying

Bullying continues to affect everyday life in deep ways. It changes organizations, leaves scars on individuals, and creates a culture of negativity even hatred. Think about all the positive moments we miss in this life because of bullying. Let’s explore the more subtle aspects of bullying so we can make strides to end this plague.



Here are some questions to get us thinking in advance …

  • What picture does bullying bring to your mind?
  • How do you define bullying?
  • What mindset(s) drive bullying?
  • Why does it persist?
  • We often think of bullying as physical. What are the more subtle types?
  • How do conflict and bullying differ?
  • How are gossip and bullying connected if at all?
  • Societal pressures: Do they feed bullying?
  • Is there any correlation between resistance to change, groupthink, and bullying?
  • What steps can we take in the workplace to define and reduce bullying?
  • Can people skills make a big impact to end bullying? How?



Final versions of these questions will post live during the chat. If you cannot attend this Sunday at 10am ET, please help us promote it on your social streams with hashtag #Peopleskills. Many thanks!

End Bullying: Image is sign stop bullying.

End Bullying: JOIN #Peopleskills global Twitter chat rally!




So bring your heart and your focus and join us from around the globe this Sunday in people skills global Twitter chat — May 31, 2015 10am ET (Hashtag: #peopleskills) — our online rally to end bullying.


We have one rule in People Skills Chat: Respect even when we disagree.


I also invite you to continue this chat by joining our Google+ People Skills Community, our Facebook Group People Skills That Really Matter and our LinkedIn Group People Skills Succeed to contribute and learn 24×7. Get your people skills community member badge here.



Shout Outs of Gratitude

Continued thanks to generous people skills community moderators Chantal Bechervaise, Dave Moore, Hoda Maalouf, Jandis Price, Tracy Shroyer and Tom Rhodes for their time, generosity, insight, and contributions.




Thanks to all committed community members who participate in our people skills global Twitter chats (#peopleskills) and online groups. Last, but not least, a warm welcome to newcomers who continue to join our community.






Hope you will all join People Skills global Twitter chat #peopleskills this Sunday May 27, 2015 10am ET/7am PT for our online rally to end bullying!







How to Participate
If you have never been in a Twitter chat, you may find it helpful to log on to Tchat.io, Tweetchat.com or Twubs.com, enter hashtag #peopleskills, and sign in to your Twitter account. The venue will insert the hashtag on each of your tweets and you will see all the tweets on one screen. Other tools available are Hootsuite and TweetDeck.

I am the founder and host of the chat and will be happy to answer any questions you have in advance: Email me.


Chat with you this Sun. May 31, 2015 10am ET in People Skills global Twitter Chat (#peopleskills), for our online rally to end bullying.


Until then, as always, I wish you bonds of happiness and success!

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

 

 

PS-EnergyBar-LogoJoin me through these social channels

Engage in people skills learning! Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience. I invite your questions, share my experience, and welcome your wisdom.

Holocracy & Flat Organizations Reveal Human Truths

You would think that a holacracy, a truly flat organization with no tiers of management, would be every employee’s dream. It isn’t. Holacracy presents many challenges for employees. In fact, holacracy reveals why many employees like well-run hierarchy.



Holacracy: Image is blank field of snow.

Holacracy: Why Employees Like Hierarchy Image by Martin Beaumont via Flickr.

Image by Martin Beaumont via Flickr Creative Commons License.

Holacracy: What Employees Like About Hierarchy

Holacracy, like at Zappos and other lesser known companies, is revealing much about what many employees find so comfortable about traditional management structures. Some of these are surprising and others rather evident. The list holds great lessons for both styles of organization.

  1. In hierarchy, there is security. Holacracy feels scary and risky.
  2. In well-run hierarchy, there is clarity. In holacracy, everyone must clarify everything.
  3. In well-run hierarchy, decisions seem to happen more quickly. Holacracy feels time consuming and laborious.
  4. In hierarchy, influencing others and resolving conflict sits with management. In holacracy, employees face this challenge and without the helpful title of authority.

  5. In hierarchy, there is vertical career growth. The flatness of holacracy leaves many aspiring leaders flat. They must find a sense of worth in professional development and project achievements vs. titles.
  6. In hierarchy, management supposedly addresses egotistical and maverick behaviors. Without managers as buffers, all employees must handle this. It’s uncomfortable and challenging. It requires great people skills.
  7. Hierarchy and titles strengthen less courageous employees. I’ve witnessed employees resisting the wonderful leadership of a peer. They told the peer “we’re not strong like you.” The peer was promoted to being their leader and they followed without resistance. Organizational titles are the extra security blanket they love.
  8. In well-run hierarchy, employees can get things done through the management structure. In holacracy, employees must learn how to get things done other ways. They must develop and use skills to hit the bulls-eye without authority and formal power.



THE challenge for employees in holacracy:



In my workshops and coaching, we explore the people skills for great collaboration and teamwork. My next blog post will delve into these people skills for holacracy. In the meantime,



Your turn: What other challenges are there in holacracy?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
10 Ways to Work With Immature Teammates
The Surprising Secret Within Every Great Communicator
9 People Skills Tips for Potent Influential Communication
People Skills Philosophy For Success With Others
7 Pleasures That Calm When Dealing w/ Toxic People

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Leaders claim objectivity is valuable in preventing emotionally skewed decisions. Yet if leaders detach to be objective or come across as indifferent, they disengage employees and results suffer.


Leaders, are you helpfully objective or actually indifferent?

Leaders, Are You Helpfully Objective or Actually Indifferent? Image by: HikingArtist.com

 

Helpfully Objectivity

  • Considers all perspectives to ensure accurate results
  • Researches what is behind emotion to unearth weighty factors
  • Gets close enough to find and see the truth
  • Respects passion’s lift more than it fears its drag
  • Boldly taps emotion to inspire and engage employees

 

Objectivity Turns Into or Seems Like Indifference

When leaders …

  • Glorify measurements over all other types of information
  • Distance themselves in the fear that getting close will limit their honesty and objectivity
  • Mislabel all passion as illogical
  • Act solo because they lack trust in those around them
  • Revel in the comfort and false security of their own views and personality type
  • Push aside diverse new views under the guise of tried-and-true ways
  • Hold their positional power and/or expertise as the ultimate factor in decision making








Objectivity requires a true and complete picture. It sees the value of emotion. It understands diverse factors and perspectives.

Meanwhile, fear, the comfort of habit, and love of data and procedures try to disguise indifference as objectivity. The disguise backfires and leads to a skewed view and poor decisions.


Identify what obstacles are keeping you from engaging with employees, from seeing diverse views, and from building closer relationships. Develop emotional intelligence to overcome those blocks! It is far easier than you think and the business rewards are great.



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
5 Steps to Developing Emotional Intelligence
Leadership Engagement: How to Reach Employees Not Preach to Them
Want Engaged Employees: Don’t Confuse Contentment w/ Lack of Ambition

Grateful for the use of Image by: HikingArtist.com via Flickr Creative Commons License.

©2013-2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Leadership Engagement: Focus on Development Not Self-Sacrifice

Leaders, when you face employees who lack commitment resist the temptation to tell them how hard you work. You think you will inspire self-sacrifice and commitment. Guess again! Leadership engagement is about reaching them not preaching to them.



Leadership Engagement: Image is quote by Elizabeth Cady Stanton on self-development

Leadership Engagement: How to Reach Employees Not Preach to Them Image via DecentQuotes.com

Image via DecentQuotes.


Leadership Engagement: How to Reach Not Preach

Self-sacrifice is not an order you give. It’s an awakening within someone, an arrival.

Leaders who have arrived tell others to get there when those leaders:

  • Are new to leadership. They don’t know how to reach others so they preach.
  • Believe that leadership is about themselves.
  • Get frustrated when employees are not engaging at high level.



Leadership Engagement Sad Story

Leader named Carmen was addressing a young under-performing employee. The employee gave reasons (excuses) for often being late and asked for more interesting work. Carmen replied “Let me tell you what I have to do every morning. My wife leaves very early for her shift work. Her mother is an invalid and lives with us. I have to bathe my mother-in-law, walk the dog, pick up the elder-care worker from the bus stop, get her back to the house and then get myself to work. Are you saying your life is tougher than mine?

This did not change the employee’s performance. Carmen’s self-sacrifice doesn’t awaken the employee’s sense of duty nor commitment.

To awaken commitment in employees:

  • Unearth how they think and what they care about.
  • Discuss self-development instead of self-sacrifice. “What behaviors do you think you need to develop to meet your goals?”
  • Then guide the conversation to how self-development feeds the team and the team feeds each individual. e.g. “When you are late, you let the team down.”


Leadership engagement doesn’t yield to the outrage of a frequently tardy employee asking for more interesting work. It also doesn’t hand out more interesting work to get the employee to show up on time.

Step back from frustration, outrage and the temptation to preach. Reach the employee with what they care about and map it back to the organization’s goals and team support.




Is self-sacrifice relevant in today’s workplace? Or is that a bygone era?


My blog posts reflect scenarios I face in my consulting work (with names changed to respect privacy). I look forward to helping you turn interaction obstacles into mega teamwork and employee engagement.

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts
Leadership Engagement: Are You Leading w/ Honesty & Civility?
5 Essentials to Building 21st Century Teams
25 Incredibly Valuable Team Member Talents to Acknowledge

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.




QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™


Be Authentic Without Scaring People Away!

Many say — be authentic! It’s important to a happy successful life. Yes, unless it overruns others. Then it is obnoxious even scary.



Be Authentic Without Scaring People Away Image is Titan Moon.

Be Authentic & Without Scaring Others Away. Image by Valerie Klavens via Flickr.

Image by Val Klavens via Flickr Creative Commons License.


11 Steps to Be Authentic & Not Scare Others Away

  1. Be authentic and tactful. Authenticity doesn’t justify being rude and hurtful. It doesn’t mean saying everything without a filter.


  2. Treat others the way they want to be treated. It shows basic human respect. Observe them. Listen and understand their views. Don’t assume they want to be treated the way you want to be treated. You can be authentic and respect others’ views and preferences.

  3. Be honest not blunt. “I disagree or I see it differently” is honest. “That’s foolish or stupid” is blunt. Honest is truthful and the way to be authentic. Blunt is skewed with your slant or emotion. Be honest and tactful to be authentic.


  4. Think coexistence not conquering. You can be authentic and welcome others’ authenticity.

  5. Live with confidence AND humility. Confidence enables you to reveal who you are. Humility allows you to see who others’ are. It isn’t a fake shell. It’s an inner belief of continuous learning. Humility honors everyone (you and others) without minimizing anyone. Be confident and humble to be authentic.


  6. As a teammate, recognize your talents AND those of others. You can be authentic and speak about your talents IF you applaud others’ talents as well. Else, it seems obnoxious and self-absorbed.

  7. As a leader, lead with empathy and appreciation. Inspire, engage, and appreciate those your lead. The relationships you build allow you to lead even in tough times without fear tactics. Be appreciative of others to be authentic without scaring them.

  8. Be courteous and polite. It doesn’t mean you’re fake. It doesn’t mean you agree with them. It means you can show respect even in disagreement. Civility allows everyone to embrace authenticity.

  9. Understand and manage your expectations. Expectations can both define and communicate who you are. Dumping those expectations on others is not being authentic. It’s presumptuous and overbearing. Be authentic by knowing and managing your expectations.

  10. Moderate your frustrations don’t fry others with them. When you are frustrated with others, venting on them is not authentic. It’s insensitive. Take a minute to calm your anger and then communicate what you want in a reasonable way. “Stop whining” is rude and hurtful. “How can we solve this problem” is respectful and focused.

  11. Choose your words wisely. The language is rich with words to describe your authentic thoughts and feelings. The old saying “It’s not what you say it’s how you say it” is still true today. Avoid words that label or minimize others. “You’re just upset …” minimizes others feelings. “I can see you are upset with me …” shows a sincere authentic awareness. Be authentic through great communication!



Authenticity Without Angst – How to Get Started

Who are you? Write a description of the authentic you. Include how you want to be treated. Write down some examples of when you find it difficult to be authentic and still consider others’ needs. Now re-read the list above. How can you apply the eleven steps to those moments?



You will be able to balance your needs with others. You will see that it doesn’t reduce your authenticity. It attracts people to it!.

Share your success here! How have you balanced your needs and others?



From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
18 Things Respected Well-Liked Leaders Consistently Do
Be Selfless & Giving Not Faceless & Fake

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.




QuickSpot-grahpicV2

Engage in people skills learning!

Let’s turn interaction obstacles into business success in leadership, teamwork, and customer service experience.

I invite your questions, welcome your wisdom, and look forward to working with you.
~Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™


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