listen

PART I

Visionary customer experience leaders know that it takes more than a thin veneer of customer care to turn customers into their loyal advocates.

When you think of Ritz-Carlton, the image is one of universal excellence not because of the high end price tag but because the leaders consider every single aspect of delivering customer care. From vision through execution, the focus is success through the ultimate customer service.

This can happen in any organization of visionary leaders committed to superior customer experience.

It is a deep commitment, where loyalty takes root. The opposite of that — conquering customer loyalty with a few broad strokes — blocks the root of success and prevents growth.

Leaders, Plant Deep for Customer Loyalty - Don't Conquer With a Thin Veneer

Image by: Blockpartypress via creative commons license.

Plant Deep Roots for Customer Loyalty
The classic advice for building customer loyalty — from listening to the customer, planning & designing, to employee empowerment, brings success IF you attend to every aspect of it.

Recent Customer Experience: A Strong Growing Root Cut in Two Defensive Moments

    On several trips to Minneapolis area, I stayed at the Hilton Garden Inn in Eagan, MN. As a Hilton Honors member, I checked the Hilton family of hotels first for my upcoming trip. The Garden Inn had the features that I needed: Clean comfortable hotel near the work site, restaurant onsite, shuttle service to/from airport, accessibility to taxis, and a good star rating.

    The first trip delighted me with positive customer service attitudes from managers and staff. So I automatically booked the Eagan Hilton Garden Inn for the second trip. Again, the service attitudes were warm, welcoming, attentive to detail, and flexible on special requests.

    I thus booked it for the third trip on this project. My customer loyalty to the brand and property was well on its way. They had removed all reasons for me to even consider another hotel.

    And then it happened. During that stay, they reserved a taxi for me to get to the work site. I came down at 7:15am, went outside to the cab driver, and he asked me for my room number. I replied that for safety reasons of course I never give out my room number. I gave him my first name and asked him if I was his ride? He insisted on my room number. I asked if he would like to go back inside with me so they could indeed confirm that I was his 7:15 am ride. He agreed.

    I described the situation to the Karen at the front desk, gave her my name, and noted that of course I don’t give out my room number. She looked in the reservations book, looked me in the eye, turned to the cab driver and said, “Her room number is 210.”

    Karen gave out my room number and threw my request back in my face with blatant disregard for my preference and concern. Shocked, I said to her, “Excuse me, you just gave my room number to this man.”

    Karen replied, “the cab company requires it”.

    I thought to myself: You take orders from the cab company and push my preferences and safety aside?
    Instead I repeated, “You just gave this man my room number.”

    Karen replied, “Nothing has ever happened.”
    I thought to myself: So you will change the procedure after something bad happens? There is a reason room keys don’t have room numbers printed on them.

    Nonetheless, I simply repeated one last time, “You just gave out my room number. How are you going to fix this?”

    She then fired the final bullet: “Are you going to argue with me or are you going to get in the cab?”

    What??#!? Since when is a customer objection to a hotel’s mistake seen as arguing? I immediately asked to speak with a manager. She replied: “I am the manager on duty.”


After work I spoke with Jason, the general manager.

Even though he put me in a suite, comped me a room, and gave me dinner, he showed that he too defined customer experience as a veneer of customer care. He, general manager, severed my loyalty when, in the middle of telling me how sorry he was, added that Karen was a good manager.

Wrong Jason. A good manager doesn’t verbally attack a customer communicating a safety concern.

Karen’s approach to conquering my objection with an ultimatum about getting in the cab couldn’t even be called customer service. It was a rude, low class, insulting personal attack to silence me and get me out of the hotel. It showed defensiveness about her mistake and incompetence in service recovery.

If Karen were a staff member, you would consider remedial training. When a manager makes this attack and the general manager defends this manager as capable, it is a statement about the brand’s definition of a great service experience.

Although, they stated they would never again use any cab company that requires room numbers, their purely reactive view of great service means customers will suffer a bad experience before the hotel learns and improves. It also says nothing about delivering great care when a customer is highly dissatisfied — another critical moment, the studies show, for securing loyalty.

When I checked out the next morning and Karen was at the desk, I wondered how many other customers would unfortunately suffer that day and in the future. My memory is one of gross disrespect and disregard for me — not one of a free room and dinner.

I now have a reason to consider a different hotel brand for my next trip.

The root of customer loyalty grows from a deep and pervasive care about everything that affects the customer. The root at the Hilton Garden Inn Eagan stops growing at the bedrock of management’s expectations of its front line managers and the thin veneer of care that defines their view of great service.


In the next post, Part II of this customer experience, I will provide a deeper list of the steps to customer experienced based loyalty. In the meantime, ask yourself — How do your staff and managers react when customers object?

Do they listen with great care and use their empowerment to make significant changes? Or do they snip back to conquer the customers’ objections and pretend to care with a thin veneer?

If you think they are doing it right, dig deep to make sure. Almost sure isn’t enough to build customer loyalty.

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™

Related Post: THE Threat to Superior Customer Experience

©2012 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please first email info@katenasser.com for terms of use. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on customer service & experience, employee engagement, teamwork, and leading change. Kate turns interaction obstacles into business success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

Leaders have leaders reporting to them. If you are a top leader, do you know if your direct reports are fueling growth, change, and success?

Or are your direct reports a wart on the arm of progress — blocking change despite what they are telling you?


Leaders, Are Your Direct Reports a Wart on Arm of Progress? Image by: Charles Williams




5 signs that your leaders are a wart on progress:


  1. They demoralize teams by speaking about the past instead of the future. Example: Why didn’t you or we should have. No matter how this is spoken, it doesn’t fuel commitment to change. It fuels resentment, fear, and guarded behavior. Progress flourishes with learning and confident exploration.

  2. They say they will lead change while claiming there is not yet enough data, time, or resources to make a decision. Their wart may be the fear of failure or inability to see ahead from the current picture. Effective leaders know that progress materializes from incremental steps not a complete roadmap.

  3. They seem like star performers yet can’t rally others to star performance. Their wart may be an unwillingness to stand back for others to shine. They are so headstrong, they listen to nobody and block team input. Teams need to have a voice else they sense progress is outside their grasp. Related Post: Is Our Knowedge Too Noisy to Listen?

  4. They crush others with the demand for perfection. Their wart is perfectionism. The quest for excellence breeds progress; perfectionism kills it like the disease it is.

  5. They are a lid that fits any pot. Their wart is lack of identity. Teams rarely trust them for they feel clueless. Flexible leaders inspire contribution and progress; nondescript leaders leave teams bewildered without a vision. Without vision, progress falters.



If your organization is not progressing toward the vision, look at the leaders reporting to you.

Are they inspiring teams, communicating, and breeding excellence? Or do they suffer from any of the 5 warts noted above?


Your mentoring or guidance from a professional coach can remove the warts and get the organization, once again, on the road to progress.

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™


©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish this post, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach™, delivers consulting, training, DVDs, and keynotes on customer service experience, teamwork, and leading change. She turns interaction obstacles into business success in tough times of change. See this site for workshop outlines and customer results.

Working on the front lines of customer service can be wonderful or terrible. It depends on your mindset – on what you picturenot on the customer. Surprised?

It’s actually good news. What happens when you interact with others is not completely random. Success is within your grasp because what you picture, you create!

It’s not voodoo. It simply that what you picture or think about, you focus on, say, and do.

Customer Service: If you picture it, you create it.

Customer service starts with picturing that you can make a positive difference.

If instead you picture difficulty or conflict, you will focus on being right, being heard, and being in control. All of this creates the difficulty you pictured at the start.


The Story


I walked into the airport luggage service office when I arrived at my destination and my luggage didn’t. As the line inched forward toward the service rep behind the computer, I noticed that each person leaving the office was surprisingly calm.

When I reached the service rep, he handled my problem with empathy, accuracy, and calm confidence. Before I left the room, I said to him: “I teach customer service to large corporations and reps tell me how stressed out they are. How do you stay so positive with so many people in here complaining?”

He replied: “Kate, if they’re smiling when they come in here … they’re in the wrong room!”


He understood what people would naturally feel and he became the picture of a man making a difference.

    Picture the positive and you reduce your fear. Result: Increased listening that guides the interaction to success.

    Picture the positive and you feel influential with no need to control others. Result: A collaborative success instead of a target shoot.

    Picture the positive and you project empathy and connect sincerely. Result: You make a difference and that is great customer service.



One informed rep with a positive attitude and one customer-friendly policy of delivering luggage created a positive customer experience instead of a social media rant.

What you picture you create!

What will you and your teams picture before you all start work tomorrow? I hope that it’s caring for customers and making a difference.

Yours in service,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach


Related post: Customer Service, Key Link in the Chain not Life in Chains

©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. If you want to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, delivers workshops, keynotes, and consultations that inspire the ultimate interaction with customers. Leaders have been booking Kate to bring both her customer service experience and intuition to their success — repeatedly. See this site for customer results and book Kate now.

Obviously, in sales and customer service, listening is critical to success. Not so obvious is how to listen for customer cares when your mind is processing your own perspective.

What’s in it for you to work on this? Sales & service fail when you don’t address customer cares. Moreover, customers even select higher priced products and services when you show them you get what they care about.

Sales & Customer Service: Listen for Customer Cares

Winning Ways to Listen for Customer Cares

  1. Hear the story as well as the details. If you are highly analytic, you may naturally listen for details. You may miss important customer cares because they emerge as the sum of the details. Do you listen for the whole point of the story?
    Winning way: If this is your listening challenge, say to the customer “I hear these details (a. b. c. …). If we put this together, what does it say about your key interest or concern?” It shows the customer you listen & you care!

  2. Accept the obvious. Often customers are clearly stating their preferences. When it represents a challenge to what you want or can deliver, do you respond with what’s on your mind?
    Winning way: Paraphrase the customer’s preference then respond. If you do this consistently, you will listen better, sell more, and serve well. You and the customers will connect with mutual success.

  3. Be excellent instead of right. Working with others, especially with customers, is first about excellence in connecting. It is the nexus of trust. Successful results come from excellent connections not from you pressing your points at the start. Once you are connected to the customers’ cares, they are more capable of hearing your perspective and valuable ideas.
    Winning way: Respect the differences, learn to love the differences, find the fit. One key step: Spot and Adapt to Personality Types.

Success in sales & service is within your easy reach if you reach outside your own perspective. Staying inside your own zone of communication style, knowledge, and control keeps you comfortably disconnected — from success. Think about it …

Yours in service,
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach

What is your best listening skills tip? Please share your people-skills experience in the comments field below.


©2011 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. For permission to re-post or republish, please email info@katenasser.com. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, has amassed 21 years of stellar results with corporate customers turning interpersonal obstacles into business success. Her energy is legendary, her insight objective, and her results tangible. See this site for info about her keynotes, workshops, and dvds.

Ever meet someone who is very good with people – all different types of people?  In the workplace you see their professional people skills shine in various situations.    You wonder, “What makes them so successful with diverse people and in widely different situations?”  Look more closely or speak with them and you will find the best professional people skills develop from these four practices.

As you read each point, note one thing you do well and one thing you will do to improve.


Practices: Best Professional People Skills

  1. Know Yourself Very Well. Your social style/personality type. Your hot buttons. Your fears. Your pet peeves. Your odd quirks that bother other people. Your natural talents. Your work ethic. Your definition of a happy life. Your definition of success…

  2. Observe and listen to others. This is the critical step for developing outstanding professional people skills.  Observe and listen in order to constantly learn more about other people.  The data you collect is the fuel and the guidance system for successful interactions.  Those with outstanding professional people skills are always learning about others!

  3. Practice Flexibility. Most people interact with others by treating them the way they, themselves, want to be treated.   Unless the world is full of clones, this will not breed great interactions. 
    The best in professional people skills use the data they have collected about others to adapt to others.   To do this you must believe flexibility is a sign of strength not weakness.  Flexibility is a skill that allows you to work with diverse people in a wide range of situations. 
    Most importantly, do not mistake flexibility for indecisiveness.  The best in professional people skills use flexibility for successful connections with others – and achieve tangible results.

  4. Flexibility & Balance for People Skills Image by:Lady_K

  5. Achieve Balance.
    How balanced are you in your professional people skills?

    • Balance your drive for action with empathy for others’ needs.
    • Balance honesty with diplomacy to communicate your message clearly without brutality.
    • See the details that others focus on while compiling the big picture.
    • Balance your knowledge and expertise with input from others.
    • Know when to push ahead with your thoughts and when to pull back to deliver your thoughts at the right moment.
    • Balance your need for bonding with respect for others’ need for independence.
    • Deliver even the toughest news with respect for the humans involved.
    • Lead change with inspiration and grit.

Think of all the applications of the best professional people skills.  Leaders who can inspire both morale and great results.  Soaring sales when you connect with customers and understand and meet their needs.  Successful, cost effective, and timely completion of projects from clear communication & teamwork.  

Professional people skills build trust and collaboration that deliver results!

I have noted 4 practices above.  Is there a 5th and 6th?  What would you add?


Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach delivers workshops, keynotes, consultations, and DVDs that develop your professional people skills. See this site for more information and what others have said about her sessions.

Kudos and a heartfelt thank you to Verizon Wireless CSR Lori-El.

Happy on tough days.

Best CSRs Do This! Photo by:Photophonic


Customer service rep (CSR) Lori-El worked through confusing issues on my account with an inquisitive intelligent approach while taking care (and I do mean care) of me. I would definitely rate her as one of the best call center CSRs I have had in recent times.

In the last blog post I focused on The 25 Worst Customer Service Stories to Train the Best CSRs.

Today I am very pleased to outline how the best CSRs act in delivering customer service. Please add your best actions in the comments field below.





Best CSRs Action Checklist

Verizon Wireless CSR Lori-El did this well in delivering customer service.

  1. Sincere conversation not a scripted recitation.
  2. Listens for the customer’s personality and demeanor and then maps actions to it.
  3. Listens to every piece of information the customer offers without jumping over words.
  4. Shares control of the call with the customer instead of driving it through a predetermined path.
  5. Listens to the customer’s level of knowledge and speaks to that level (not above or below).
  6. Thanks the customer for input during the call not just at the end.
  7. Apologizes once for the length of time it is taking to resolve it and keeps moving on resolving it!
  8. Asks permission to access the customer’s records and then uses the information to go the extra mile.
  9. Continues to listen to related questions and answers them clearly.
  10. Uses confusing moments to learn and then teach the customer instead of saying. “I don’t know.”
  11. Is honest about current obstacles to resolution and then finds a work-around!
  12. Sounds happy to be at work even when doing overtime or having a tough day.
  13. Streamlines future contact by giving an updated phone number to call.
  14. Uses positive forward focused language instead of negative phrases.
  15. The conversation shows responsibility and initiative in resolving the problems. Never blames the customer.
  16. Resolves the current issues and then considers the customer’s future needs and forecasts solutions. (e.g. If you switch to a Blackberry or SmartPhone you might encounter this problem and we can fix that as well.)
  17. Tone of voice throughout the call is sincere, focused, and action-oriented.  Closing remark reflects that as well.


Please feel free to add your best actions to this list in the comments field below.



Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, delivers customer care and customer service workshops, webinars, and DVDs globally. Her intuition and experience with people is a valuable resource to your business success. Read what other customers say about her results – click “endorsements” on this site.