Increase Respect: Ways to Stop Expecting People to Be You | #PeopleSkills

Increase respect for others by not expecting them to be like you. This shift is essential for leaders and teams in order to reach their goals. Yet, there are also advantages to each person to make this shift. To that end, here are specific ways to stop expecting people to be like you.



Increase Respect for Differences: Image is apple and orange slices alternating in a stack.

Increase Respect: Ways to Stop Expecting People to Be Like You! Image by Salvatore Gerace via Flickr Creative Commons License.

Image by Salvatore Gerace via Flickr Creative Commons License.


Increase Respect: Ways to Stop Expecting People to Be You

Think of how much easier and more fulfilling your life will be in and outside of work if you increase respect by embracing differences in people.



7 Ways to Stop Expecting People to Be Like You

  1. Identify your fears and past scars. How do you feel when you are around people who are not like you? Any fears? Dig deep and discover your concerns.

  2. Take note of your frustrations. Sometimes when you face different personality types, you get frustrated. Why? What do you wish they would do? Then stop and ask yourself, what do they offer that can help you?

  3. Ask yourself, are you looking for validation? One reason you may like being around others who are like you is validation of who you are. So, figure out how you can be proud and happy with who you are without validation from others.

  4. Replace the need to put others down with the inner happiness of celebrating others for who they are.

  5. Live with a growth mindset. Meeting people who are not like you is low pain high gain growth. If one day passes without learning something new, you are missing out on so much!

  6. Trust yourself. Being open to differences doesn’t mean that people will walk all over you. Remember, that even people who are like you may try to take advantage of you. You have the skills to spot selfish people and set limits no matter who they are.

  7. Love yourself and love how you grow. The more comfortable and secure you are with yourself, the easier it is to embrace others who are not like you.


Benefits of Respecting & Embracing Differences



  • Free of resentment. You can then live and work much better with others.

  • Clear picture of what is possible with each person. A friend told me she was frustrated that her sister was not helping out enough with their elderly parents. My friend was getting more annoyed each day. Then a doctor she truly trusted said, “Maybe that’s the best your sister can do.” It was a turning point for my friend. It actually empowered her resolve to find other ways to get more help for her parents.

  • Moving on to find the connections you need for any specific purpose. When you stop expecting people to be like you, you see their talents and strengths.

  • Being a far more effective leader and/or team member. When you show you are flexible and can work with anyone, your star rises at work. Being non-judgmental and highly effective is a great reputation!

  • Helping to change the world for the better. As we increase respect for differences, we make the world a better place. Do you want that to be your legacy?


Increase Respect & Get Rid of Affinity Bias

When you increase respect of others, you receive more respect in return. It’s human nature. Everyone wants respect for who they are. So give respect and set yourself free of the powerful force known as affinity bias. Affinity bias makes you want to be around primarily people who are like you. And often you don’t even know you are doing it! Escape that trap that keeps you from learning and growing. Use the seven steps noted above.



How have you grown from being around people who are not like you?


From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Posts:
GPS Your Brain to Work w/ Any Personality Type (short video)
16 Moments When We’re Most Likely to Disrespect Others
Respect ALL the Differences & Find the Fit (short video)
Effects of Affinity Bias at Work and in Hiring

©2022 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

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