Leaders, What Messages Block Emotional Intelligence? | #Leadership #EQ
by Kate Nasser | Comments Off on Leaders, What Messages Block Emotional Intelligence? | #Leadership #EQ
Can the messages you want to send to others block emotional intelligence? They sure can. They block your emotional intelligence as you think of these messages. Yet you may not be aware that it is happening. So use this list as a starting point to increase your self-awareness and preserve your emotional intelligence.
Which Messages Block Emotional Intelligence?
Whether you are a leader, manager, project manager, case worker, or service professional, be aware of what you are thinking before you speak! Know your purpose and don’t let that purpose block your emotional intelligence.
The “I must” Messages:
Reset their expectations. You are likely to talk at them and that blocks your emotional intelligence and listening.
Get them to see things my way. You are headed for a monologue and emotional intelligence will not emerge.
Meet my short term goals right now. You are thinking about your success and not about others. Big problem!
Turn everyone around. You are seeing them as objects not as people. This blocks your emotional intelligence.
Toughen them up. If you are thinking about toughness, you are not thinking of emotional intelligence.
Show them who’s in charge. The insecurity that drives you to this message blocks emotional awareness and intelligence.
What To Do Instead!
First of all, be aware of what messages are playing in your head. Secondly, ask yourself what other people need from you at the moment you will speak with them.
To be treated as an equal not an object.
Participation with you vs. following your orders.
Clear understanding and a chance to be heard.
Sense of control over their own lives at that moment.
Finally, write down how you are going to start the discussion. Outline a few key points. Then re-read them and see what you would change to meet their needs during the discussion.
Don’t let the messages in your head block emotional intelligence. Prevent inflicting scars on others else you will find it hard to work with them in the future.
From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™
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Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.
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