What Peace Loving Leaders Do Incorrectly in Conflict | #Leadership #LeadMorale

Peace loving leaders can achieve great success or create a disastrous mess. It all depends on what they do when conflict emerges. Here’s what several peace loving leaders do wrong in conflict. Learn from this list and handle conflict skillfully for better results.

Peace Loving Leaders: Image is dove w/ olive branch

What Peace Loving Leaders Do Incorrectly in Conflict. Image licensed via 123RF.com

Image licnesed via 123RF.com

What Peace Loving Leaders Often Do Wrong in Conflict

Leaders, assess what you do during conflict using this list of common mistakes. It is critical to leading, leading morale, and creating success for all involved.

    Peace Loving Leaders Make Focus Mistakes

  1. By primarily focusing on peace. As a result, they lose sight of leadership goals and results. Tip: Keep sight of your true purpose as a leader.

  2. By caring first and foremost about their inner peace. Thus, they ignore the needs of those they lead. They don’t communicate nearly enough nor clearly enough. Tip: Serve those you lead, not just yourself.

  3. They Can Become Self-Righteous

  4. With peace as a consuming goal, peace loving leaders look down on people having conflict. They patronize and make things worse. Tip: Realize that conflict can lead to great results. Help resolve it!

  5. They sacrifice people’s respect in order to get peace — at any price. Those you lead will resent you as you trade their respect and dignity for a quick peace.

  6. They start preaching. I heard one leader actually tell an employee, “I am going to get you to feel more loving toward others.” Whoa. When that came out of the leader’s mouth, the leader’s integrity went out the door. Tip: Treat your employees as adults deserving of dignity. Treating them like children to get the peace you crave is not acceptable.

  7. They Often Wear Blinders & Deny Reality

  8. Peace loving leaders ignore the signs of emerging conflict. Their alternate view that everything and everyone is fine blinds them to what’s truly happening. Then festering conflicts explode and leave unnecessary scars. Tip: Take off your blinders.

  9. They abandon those they lead and call it empowerment. I hear them say, “These folks are adults and can work it all out themselves.” Big mistake! Leaders play a significant role in modeling how to resolve conflict. Tip: Facilitate, teach, and model how to do it.

  10. They deny that a high performer is creating unnecessary conflict. These leaders want to feel peaceful and avoid the tough conversation about positive teamwork behaviors. They create a disastrous mess of morale. Tip: Clarify what is expected of every team member.

  11. They Create Confusion & Wrong Impressions

  12. Peace loving leaders send mixed messages. Their title of leader says they will handle tough moments. Their words and actions leave people hanging and confused — especially in difficult times. Tip: Remember that sometimes you must go through conflict to achieve peace.

  13. They scare the bejeebers out of those who need help. They seem weak and ineffective as they waffle during conflict. Tip: Use your great problem solving and people skills to help resolve conflict and find win/win solutions. Then you will have peace.

When daily peace becomes a leader’s all-consuming goal, it becomes the obstacle to achieving true peace. It may even drive some leaders to become autocratic and ban conflict. This doesn’t create peace. It simply sends the conflict into the shadows where people churn instead of achieving success with each other.

Be a leader — help resolve conflicts and spur success!

From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

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©2019 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.

Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

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2 Responses to “What Peace Loving Leaders Do Incorrectly in Conflict | #Leadership #LeadMorale”

  1. Kate! What I got from your post that is, political leadership, social advisors, religious guides all have some of these issues in their lives. Only one leadership have full awareness about this topic and that’s “Military Leadership”. Strong nerve control is basic need for this trait. I have attended many military personnel workshops and seminars, they are enriched with such leadership advises you have pointed out.

    • Kate Nasser says:

      Hi Farrukh,
      Interesting perspective Farrukh. I didn’t have military leadership style in mind when I wrote the post. Although I can see the possibilities in what you say here, I also know that non-military style leadership (participatory, inspirational, engaging in decision making) can also have and use the techniques I mentioned for times of conflict.

      Many thanks for adding to this discussion!

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