Essential Truth: Be Verbally Abusive & You Lose Everything | #PeopleSkills
by Kate Nasser | 4 Comments »
Being verbally abusive makes you lose everything. You lose your dignity, reputation, trustworthiness, relationships, customers, potential opportunities, and the list goes on. So if you ever get close to verbally abusing others, stop. Remember, when you verbally abuse — you lose. Here’s why.
Why Being Verbally Abusive Makes You Lose Everything
Once you are verbally abusive, those who witness it will never see you as worthy of their respect. They will never completely forget how you dehumanized others and will not trust you. It’s unlikely they will see you in a positive way again. As for those you verbally abuse, they have nothing more to lose by treating you badly in return.
You have played your whole hand and have no cards left. To them your degrading outburst is inhuman and you are a zero. Even when you apologize, they see you in the same way.
Increase Your Self-Awareness to Avoid Verbally Abusing Others
Do you ever feel …
Disrespected and devalued?
Powerless to get what you want?
Pushed around and stepped on?
Over-extended and running out of patience?
Entitled to hurt/harm others?
These and similar feelings are warning signs. Step back and take time to strengthen your self-worth. Verbally abusing others can never do that. When you value yourself, you hold on to your integrity and your power. Congratulations on believing in yourself and not verbally abusing others!
From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™
7 People Skills Steps to Avoid Intense Verbal Conflict
5 Ways to Stay Calm & Caring w/ Rude Angry Customers
©2019 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email firstname.lastname@example.org for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.
Get more inspiration and actionable tips for high engagement results!
Buy Kate Nasser’s new book Leading Morale (Amazon.com).
I once worked for a leader who was also a friend. He was the SVP and three of us, all VPs reported to him. It’s been years but I’ll never forget when we traveled as a team to an off-site meeting and things were not looking up for our initiatives. The SVP was so frustrated that when we sat down for a team debrief, he yelled at my two peers. He raised his voice and spoke to them very disrespectfully with the words that he chose. He chastised them for things out of their control because he felt out of control. Needless to say, within a month one of them left and a month after that the other one did too. Ultimately, I did too. Spot on, Kate.
I am so grateful for your comments because you bring your real life experiences for all to experience. People can picture what you describe and very likely think of similar situations in their work and life.
And the truth is, people walk away — they leave you — if you verbally abuse them and they never forget. So the verbal abuser is stuck with that label forever.
Hi Kate good piece. I believe most people in business have wither witnessed or experience verbally abuse; which needless to say is not good. However, the outcome is inevitably the same. As Alli Polin mentioned in her personal story, people leave because people do not want nor deserve to be talked in a disrespectful manner. And as you mentioned in your piece, when someone verbally abuses another person, it only shows the lack of control this individual has and others notice and don’t forget.
Keep up the great work!
Many thanks Gabe for weighing in on this eternal challenge. I am grateful for your input!