People Skills Success Radar: Discover Your Empathy | #leadership

People Skills Success Radar: 9 Hidden Places to Find Your Empathy

It takes great people skills to succeed in business and it takes empathy to have great people skills. Have you discovered the full extent of your empathy? Without empathy — understanding and feeling what others are feeling — you fail to build trust and true connection.



People Skills Success Discover Your Empathy: Image is a humanoid w/ binoculars

People Skills Success Radar: Discover Your Empathy. Image licensed from Istock.com

Image licensed from Istock.com.

People Skills Success Radar: 9 Hidden Places to Find Your Empathy

Find your empathy to lead and engage employees, work with teammates, collaborate on projects, and succeed with customers. Give it even in the toughest moments. Your people skills success radar will help you find it.



Here is where empathy often hides:

  1. In what you are afraid to be. When people want to be seen as tough and strong, empathy hides to protect that image. Release and give your empathy. It shows that you are truly secure in who you are and confident enough to care for others. Inner strength is your billboard not fake toughness.



  2. In what you never received. Your empathy hides behind your unconscious scar of not receiving any. Find your empathy there and give it to others. It is the best way to get empathy and remove your scar.


  3. In the fear of failure. When people are afraid they will fail, they sometimes focus too much on themselves. Their fear hides their empathy. Uncover your empathy to uncover people skills success in business.


  4. In the myth that empathy makes others weak. Feeling what others feel doesn’t make them weak. Connection lifts people up. Your empathy makes them stronger as you light another way to success.


  5. In a logical focus. People who find comfort in logic — and discomfort in feelings — bury their empathy underneath analysis. Dig it up. Empathize before you analyze. It doesn’t bury you in feelings. Empathy is the connection before the solution. It is the secret to people skills success.



  6. Behind a wall of mistrust. When people are stung by an emotional manipulator, they sometimes put up walls to future connection. They don’t want to empathize and be stung by anyone again. Don’t hide your pain behind the wall. Call the stingers what they are — stinkers! Then share your empathy with the rest of the wonderful caring people in your world. Otherwise, the stinkers hide your people skills success behind the wall forever.


  7. In the wrong definition of empathy. Empathy doesn’t mean you agree with others. It simply says: “You matter, we matter, this matters, let’s find a solution.” You can empathize with someone’s feelings and yet not agree with their reasoning, conclusion, or solution. Share your empathy first to help them see a different view.


  8. In a judgmental ego. “I told you so” and “Everything that happened to you is your own fault” scream out your weakness. Quite ironic since these statements attempt to focus on others’ weakness! Silence your judgmental ego w/ a more powerful force — empathy. Then watch the magical power of connection bring you success.



  9. In a vengeful spirit. If you live a get even life, your empathy and success have difficulty living there too. And few will want to be there with you. Employees, colleagues, teammates, and definitely customers will keep their distance. Replace vengeance with forgiveness and move forward. Your empathy — not vengeance — will bring you people skills success.


Work and live the most basic human truth, success comes through connection. Empathy brings the magical power of connection to life. Find and share your empathy for people skills success.



What would you add to the list above? Is there a #10?



Let’s explore empathy in workshops with your teams and boost teamwork and business success!


From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™

Related Post:
People Skills Philosophy 4 Keys to Agility & Success in Business
What Happens When Tough Leaders Show Empathy?

©2015 Kate Nasser, CAS, Inc. Somerville, NJ. I appreciate your sharing the link to this post on your social streams. However, if you want to re-post or republish the content of this post, please email info@katenasser.com for permission and guidelines. Thank you for respecting intellectual capital.


Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.

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7 Responses to “People Skills Success Radar: Discover Your Empathy | #leadership”

  1. Alli Polin says:

    Another excellent piece, Kate! Truly, bravado often hides so many things and with some courage and vulnerability genuine empathy can finally emerge. Taking of the mask feels so scary but leadership without empathy is empty.

    ~ Alli

    • Kate Nasser says:

      Thanks Alli! Your last sentence — leadership without empathy is empty — says so much in just a few words. It immediately creates the image of a vacuum between leaders and teams. And we all know what happens in that void!

      Grateful for your contribution to this discussion.
      Kate

      • Alfred Horsford says:

        Great thoughts. Empathy has no place for selfishness. It is going out of yourself to others, feeling what they feel, sacrificing for them. It is one of the highest expressions of EQ, Emotional Quotient.

        • Kate Nasser says:

          Love your phrase Alfred .. Empathy has no place for selfishness. Great succinct way of expressing it.

          Many thanks for contributing here.

          Warmest regards,
          Kate

  2. Tom Rhodes says:

    Fantastic post Kate. I think empathy is a part of leadership which has been lost in this high speed Wall Street driven world. People are replaced by data and profits in the minds of cooperate leadership.

    Bravo for bringing it the forefront.

    • Kate Nasser says:

      Thanks Tom. You have added the element of “speed/focus” to this discussion. Wonderful! In the end, leadership is about people to create results .. not just results.

      Best,
      Kate

  3. […] 9 Hidden Places to Find & Develop Your Empathy From my professional experience to your success, Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™ […]

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