People-Skills: When Logic Blocks Success
by Kate Nasser |
Many a disagreement or impasse has emerged from the statement, That’s not logical. Professionals who say this to an employee, team member, or colleague believe they have right on their side. Ironically, when people use logic in this way, they are quite wrong for it shows poor people-skills and blocks success.
There are societal influences that feed (yet don’t justify) this twisted use of logic. How many times have we honored the phrase clear headed thinking? We describe successful business people as thinking with their heads not their hearts.
Nonetheless, it doesn’t take long for the sheen of these influences to wear thin and for all to see the effects of those who cast judgment on logic. These poor people-skills can block future interaction, openness, honesty, valuable exchanges of ideas, and teamwork. They can block success.
People-Skills Tip for Success
If you have used the phrase, that’s not logical, without harmful intent, it is easy to avoid the misstep in the future. When you disagree, allow yourself room to change course. Your words will explore instead of judge, discuss instead of declare, communicate instead of condemn.
With that mindset, you can easily replace that’s not logical with I don’t follow your logic or better yet, I see it another way.
Need to be Right; Need for Control.
If that approach unsettles you, your trip to success may be longer. Your need to be right and to control every situation can hold you back.
- Declarations and judgments show your limitations not the limitations of those you judge. People can see that.
- Decision makers will question your ability to handle change. You might believe they see you as decisive and valuable. Yet you appear rigid and inflexible.
- As you shut out others’ input and perspectives, you are driving blind. Your blind spots, unaddressed by those you have repelled, can undermine your success.
Stop worrying that people will misconstrue open-mindedness for uncertainty or weakness. Showing respect for others’ opinions doesn’t diminish you. It shows that you are confident and strong enough to consider all views.
Diverse professionals — sales executives, negotiators, detectives, teachers, to name just a few — use listening, learning, and understanding to create success. You can do the same!
What is your biggest challenge in interacting with people in the workplace who declare instead of discuss? I welcome your perspective in the comments section below.
Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach, has been turning interaction obstacles into interpersonal success for 20 years. See this site for info on workshops, keynotes, dvds, and customer results.