5 Ways to Prevent the Negative Effects of Being Positive #peopleskills
by Kate Nasser |
Prevent the Negative Effects of Being Too Positive!
Is your positive attitude helping yourself and others? It often can. Yet, have you ever met someone who overlooks empathy and drives their positive attitude on others?
When extremely positive people don’t account for others’ needs, their positive outlook can backfire. They can come across as patronizing, controlling, and oddly enough, insensitive.
Grateful to Kristin Resurreccion for the image via Flickr Creative Commons License.
5 Ways to Prevent the Negative Effects of Being Positive
I have a very positive attitude about life and deliver inspirational keynotes to lift others up. I have also met people who try to convert me to their version of optimism before seeing how positive I already am! This turns me off to what they have to offer.
To prevent this misstep …
- Listen in the moment and understand others’ perspectives. Listening builds trust through respect of others’ needs. Sometimes people are so busy encouraging others to be positive they don’t stop and detect what others need at that moment. Everyone is on a journey and they travel at different speeds. Some get to a positive attitude faster than others. Some don’t even want to go there.
Exception: If you are a leading an organization through change and a true resistor is slowing the pace with negativity, you will need to address that very clearly to ensure the momentum of change.
- Acknowledge and empathize. Empathy doesn’t mean you agree. It means you matter, we matter this matters. Connect with empathy to build the trust needed to influence others.
- Coach only when asked. In everyday life, don’t elect yourself someone else’s life coach. Even positive words like “I would like to encourage you to …” are somewhat arrogant if the person didn’t ask for your help. Live and enjoy your own positive attitude but don’t declare yourself Ruler of PositiveLand and issue decrees. You may become known as a royal pain in the tail.
- Blend optimism with realism. It opens the door to empathy and builds credibility. It is much easier to connect and trust someone who has their feet on the ground as they reach for the stars.
- Disagree honestly and with respect. Become comfortable with honest respectful disagreement. People disagree in life. Working through disagreements often delivers great results. Yet sometimes extremely positive people patronize during a disagreement because they seek immediate harmony. Disagreement can be a positive if it is done respectfully.
Live positively and let others see your optimism and positive choices. Blend it with empathy and realism and you ascend to trust, respect, and the long reach of influence.
From my professional experience to your success,
Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™
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Kate Nasser, The People Skills Coach™, delivers coaching, consulting, training, and keynotes on leading change, employee engagement, teamwork, and delivering the ultimate customer service. She turns interaction obstacles into interpersonal success. See this site for workshop outlines, keynote footage, and customer results.
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